[oxy-moron]

Hi
people do change but that change is largely finished by the time they are 7 or 8.
He may be motivated to improve but that motivation will weaken quite quickly.
There are many articles on the web about how the love cocktail dies away and you are faced with the reality of the person- things you ignored in the early days become issues that become major put-offs.
I think that nature wants it that way- if you dont get a child from the relationship then nature wants you both to move on to try again. Simple as that.
If you wanted to make him stay and keep him under control you would have to manipulate the relationship some how- and then how would you feel over time.

[miffed23]

My ex husband used to tell me I was also gaining weight, and that he was going to leave me if I got any bigger...I found out later that he was playing around with other women,, and was only staying because I did his dirty loundry....

This was actually my first thought to the OP's question and I nearly said check that he isn't fooling around with someone else....

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Maggie, my ex told his first wife that it's called control...having what he wants whether there is another woman or not.

What struck me in this post OP, is the relationship you "came from" you are not ascertive yet now you are, you never said no, yet now you have.

If you have said yes, more than no, all the way through you opened yourself up to ahh she will do what ever, yet, when you stand your grown they know where they are...

I also think his parents picked on your eating habits and he was embaressed...

Unless you indend to be ascertive which you have now shown, he will always feel he can walk over you.

You need to not look at yeah I love him but are you communicative, hang on to each other's word, laugh, have great sex, intimate a bond, and understand each other, really ask this question because otherwise, you found someone who wasn't as bad as your ex but is simular and there really is nothing there other than "better than the last" that's not something you settle for.

CW