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  • tubi
    Junior Member
    • Sep 2010
    • 2

    Complicated Relationship

    Hello Girls.
    i have a boyfriend its almost 3 months, well my boyfriend is a bisexual.
    well the problem is that he is to much into guys. and when he goes to a guy and talks to him (wall posts and all) it hurts me. but he doesnt have any physical contact with guys but i get scared. he says he loves me allot and i love him too, we have plans for the future and he even said he will kill himself before cheating on me. i understand him very well and his situations of him liking boys!.
    when i got in a relationship with him i stopped talking to girls in the other way and all that.
    i feel hurted and i feel really bad telling him abt all this i feel it might hurt him or his feelings.
    please tell me how to handel this :// i dont know is this jelousy or what
    please help !!
  • Hopeless Dork
    Veteran Member
    • Dec 2008
    • 4255

    The first thing you need to understand is that being bisexual doesn't make someone any more OR any less likely to cheat than a heterosexual guy. Heterosexual guys like women. When they begin a relationship with a woman, they don't stop being attracted to women... they still are, they just focus their attraction on the one they are with. When a bisexual person commits, same thing... they don't lose their attraction to either sex, but focus' on the one they are with.

    If he were straight, and making flirty wall posts at other GIRLS... would you be tolerant of that? Probably not. Just because he is bi doesn't make it okay for him to publically hit on guys -- even if he doesn't cheat on you with him. The respect for your relationship needs to be defined by both of you. Don't think that he deserves special exceptions you wouldn't give a straight bf.

    Say you were ith a guy that liked blondes a lot and you were a brunette, but he wanted you to be his gf... you wouldn't say, ahh its okay if he says flirty things to blondes... because I'm not a blonde... so he should be allowed to persue blondes as long as he doesn't cheat, afterall -- he is attracted to them.

    No, you wouldn't be cool with that... so you shouldn't be cool with him doing that with guys. Define your respect bounderies together.. what is and isn't okay for either of you -- no matter if its directed at males or females. Explain how it makes you feel, and see if he is on the same page with you.
    Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

    Comment

    • ren_07
      Senior Member
      • Jun 2009
      • 128

      The first thing you need to understand is that being bisexual doesn't make someone any more OR any less likely to cheat than a heterosexual guy.
      Couldn't say it better myself.

      However, I can see why you're feeling uneasy because you probably feel like you have TWICE the amount of potential people he could be attracted to and flirting with to worry about. This sort of makes you question your sense of paranoia and are worried about acknowledging when he's being out of line. Don't be afraid that you're looking stupid to accuse him of things he shouldn't be doing. If he cares about the future of the relationship like he seems to, he will understand and not become furious/defensive.

      Are you bisexual as well? If you don't mind me asking

      Comment

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