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  • deep_fear
    Member
    • Mar 2011
    • 33

    why am i thinking about this? :(

    hey i wrote the post " does he love me"..i guess this is a continued one except a new probelm...Ok so i love him and i'm trying to make things right..( we fight time to time..and we say hurtfull things...this is the reson for my last post) any way..i'v been having these wierd thoughts lately...the kind of thouhts i had...well when i was single..I have been fantasising about a guy with no face no name just a guy that did things i liked and acted a way i liked...Now this is the wierd thing everytime i think of this i get so mad at my self becasue...my fiancee has alot of the same hobbys as i do..and he is perfect for me in all ways ( not counting our recent problems with fighting)....So I dont know why im haveing these thoughts..and i cant stop thinking about them..I feel there is somthing wrong with me..i know I love him 100%..what do you think i should do to keep all my emotions/ mind under control...the bad thing is i sometimes us this as a escape when im board..
    ty
  • pretzel
    Veteran Member
    • Oct 2009
    • 1557

    I think you answered your own question,"the bad thing is i sometimes us this as a escape when im board.."

    Whether you call it daydreaming or fantasizing, it's your mind working on something other than what you would normally be thinking about.

    Comment

    • deep_fear
      Member
      • Mar 2011
      • 33

      but do other people think this even if there in a realshionship with some one they love..i feel bad for thinking these things

      Comment

      • pretzel
        Veteran Member
        • Oct 2009
        • 1557

        Originally posted by deep_fear
        but do other people think this even if there in a realshionship with some one they love..i feel bad for thinking these things
        yes, or at least I do. There's no harm in letting one's imagination go.

        Comment

        • miffed23
          Veteran Member
          • Mar 2008
          • 568

          You can window shop, just don't go into the store and buy the shoes.

          In other words, its quite normal to fantasise as long as that's all it is, a fantasy. We can all love our partners dearly, but still think other people are attractive. But that is as far as it goes. Dont beat yourself up so much

          Comment

          • oxy-moron
            Veteran Member
            • Oct 2010
            • 551

            Well, so you've been fighting- thats not always a bad thing.
            You should be doing some fighting or arguing or someone is being used as a doormat.
            I have seen a relationship without fighting split and end without even a decent attempt at reconciliation.
            Having a fantasy robot man that does what you want may reflect your frustration about how much control you have over your life. But at the end of the day it is the lack of control that makes excitement and adventure. As long as it is within bounds of course.
            Try meditating to overcome your anxieties.

            Comment

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