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  • jaheelsep27
    Junior Member
    • Jul 2007
    • 5

    I feel like an idiot

    Ive been having an affair with a married man we work together Im single unfortunitly hes not, its been going off and on and he knows that I"m in love with him, I have so many feelings for him, last saturday we went to work and it was only me and him working so we had sex, we had sex twice before but 2 years ago, after we had sex he tells me that we only can be friends because hes married and he has a baby on the way..I was so upset I was crying and I have been crying at work,no one at work knows anything about what is going on only my sister does..Its hard for me because I spend 40 hours a week with him at work hes like the boss and I always have to talk to him and stand next to him,I just dont know what to do.I do love him and I know its over,I really dont want to lose his friendship its more important to me than anything ,because hes been acting so different now that we had sex..Any advice for me would help thankyou
  • Guest

    Honey, you need to remove yourself from this situation and environment. I too have been exactly in this same predicament. It's tough but it is something that you should do for yourself before you go insane. In my case, I found another job, packed my belongings and moved to a new apartment, changed all my email addresses and telephone numbers. I choose to do this because it was the only way I knew how to get out of the situation. As far as the too of us being friends, nope and its better that way. I wish you the best of luck.

    Comment

    • jaheelsep27
      Junior Member
      • Jul 2007
      • 5

      hello

      Originally posted by pushingupdaisies
      Honey, you need to remove yourself from this situation and environment. I too have been exactly in this same predicament. It's tough but it is something that you should do for yourself before you go insane. In my case, I found another job, packed my belongings and moved to a new apartment, changed all my email addresses and telephone numbers. I choose to do this because it was the only way I knew how to get out of the situation. As far as the too of us being friends, nope and its better that way. I wish you the best of luck.
      Just want to say thankyou for the advice I really needed it Im gonna start looking for another job asap, again thankyou..

      Comment

      • JubesInquest
        Veteran Member
        • Jul 2007
        • 464

        Wow...

        Well, a married man is generally going to keep his wife and just have someone on the side.

        You can leave quietly--no one knows about all this but your sister.
        However, people at your job can tell you've got feelings for your "boss" and I'm sure more than a few of them can tell something's been going on between the 2 of you--even if you haven't said a word.

        No doubt the environment will be toxic for you because of what has happened; therefore, a change is good, as the poster mentioned.
        Transfer, get another job--whatever you have to do to make the environment comfortable for you.

        There is a such thing as "sexual harassment" ...
        I'll leave that alone for now.

        Comment

        • kaylar


          Never be the other woman.

          Firstly, 99.99% of the time HE HAS ABSOLUTELY
          NO INTENTION OF LEAVING HIS WIFE.

          I shout this, because over the past decades,
          it is only one case in which a man left his wife
          for the O.W. who happened to be a gold digger
          and would not let go. (He had a lot of money)

          She, who was after his money, got him to marry
          her and then went after other men, and was divorced
          but as she had a child for him, she came out alright.

          OUtside of that case; men don't leave their wives
          for other women. Simply put, if the wife was so
          bad he would have divorced her before he met you.

          If he fell so insanely in love, he'd go for a divorce
          within weeks of the relationship beginning.

          Married men want something 'on the side'.
          They will lie, cheat, trick, do whatever they
          can to get another woman and then, when they
          find a new one or their wife is threatening, dump
          her without an eye blink.

          You have to simply get out of the situation
          permanently, and make up your mind never to
          get into another such.

          Comment

          • JubesInquest
            Veteran Member
            • Jul 2007
            • 464

            Originally posted by kaylar

            Never be the other woman.

            Firstly, 99.99% of the time HE HAS ABSOLUTELY
            NO INTENTION OF LEAVING HIS WIFE.

            I shout this, because over the past decades,
            it is only one case in which a man left his wife
            for the O.W. who happened to be a gold digger
            and would not let go. (He had a lot of money)

            She, who was after his money, got him to marry
            her and then went after other men, and was divorced
            but as she had a child for him, she came out alright.

            OUtside of that case; men don't leave their wives
            for other women. Simply put, if the wife was so
            bad he would have divorced her before he met you.

            If he fell so insanely in love, he'd go for a divorce
            within weeks of the relationship beginning.

            Married men want something 'on the side'.
            They will lie, cheat, trick, do whatever they
            can to get another woman and then, when they
            find a new one or their wife is threatening, dump
            her without an eye blink.

            You have to simply get out of the situation
            permanently, and make up your mind never to
            get into another such.

            I like the way Kaylar puts it!

            May I also add this:

            If, and I do mean in one of those remotely rare cases, if the man leaves his wife for you, he'll cheat on you just like he did his wife.

            These things repeat themselves.

            Comment

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