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  • James99
    Junior Member
    • May 2012
    • 1

    My GF wants to flirt with other guys

    Firstly i want to say that im not against my girlfriend flirting with other people, i dont want to be that controlling guy who no one likes. But is it weird for her to flirt with other guys while we are together??
    She says that she cant flirt with me and so she wants to flirt with other people (apparently this includes touching) i think this would make me jealous and feel awkward. Im i right to not want her to?? or am i being controlling??
  • rosekitten
    Veteran Member
    • Aug 2011
    • 381

    If it's something you aren't comfortable with, that is your right. Personally, I'm a very flirty and touchy sort of person. But, my touching is usually fairly limited to things like putting my hand on someones arm. If they're a good friend, then hugs and such are normal. It bothered my husband at first, but he is very much a not touchy sort of person, nor does he flirt. He doesn't mind when I initiate a touch (like a hug), but men aren't allowed to touch me. You have to decide what you're okay with. If she can't consider your feelings, then she might not be the sort of person you want to be with. Would you be happy being with someone who was constantly touching other people? If you're not, she should respect that. It's not about control, it's about respect.

    As far as -just- flirting, again, it depends. I'm flirty by nature, with almost everyone. It's banter, and it's fun. I think so long as you aren't saying "you're not allowed to ever talk to any men" then it isn't controlling. She may think it is, and that's her prerogative, but if you aren't happy, then it is her that is being controlling. Relationships are about balance, and if both parties aren't happy, then the problems need to be addressed directly.

    Comment

    • lisa78
      Junior Member
      • May 2012
      • 3

      I don't think you are been controlling at all, you are just different. Personally I don't like to touch or been touch by other people and I don't flirt with other guys when I'm in a relationship, I think it's weird and disrespectful for the other person

      Comment

      • jns
        Assistant Admin
        • Mar 2010
        • 8398

        Some women and some men like to get their SOs jealous by flirting. The conflict and fighting that results makes them feel desirable. Has she figured out why she likes flirting with other guys when you are around.
        I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
        ...
        Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

        From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

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