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  • bowsandroses
    Junior Member
    • Sep 2012
    • 4

    Boyfriend - low sex drive

    So, I am 22 years old and my libido is higher than it has ever been before (which, after research, I think is expected, it's just that time in life I suppose). However, my boyfriend of three years has never had a high libido. In fact, it's really low -- and I've had talks with him, he doesn't think it's because of anything physical or wrong with him, he just says he doesn't think about sex as much as I do. He can go weeks without sex. My sex drive is so high that I find myself having to masturbate sometimes twice, everyday. I'm not complaining, I love having a high sex drive, but I don't understand my boyfriend at all. Is it true that guys sometimes don't have high sex drives? He's 24, not super fit but not over weight, he's financially stable and not stressed (that I'm aware of) and doesn't drink hardly ever. . . so I find it hard to not blame it on me. Anyone else in this situation? Advice? Suggestions?
  • jns
    Assistant Admin
    • Mar 2010
    • 8398

    The frustration of not having a reasonable amount of sex will work with your high libido and make you want sex more. Like a craving for a certain type of food. Your bf is normal in the widest sense, wanting sex only very occasionally. He may change, although I would say that is probably unlikely. Maybe there is an underlying concern, such as getting you pregnant. More likely, he is satisfying himself with porn and masturbation. If the latter is the case, he should cut back or eliminate both porn and masturbation. If nothing else works, you may have to decide if you can continue to live with his low sex drive. It is definitely not your fault from what you have described.
    I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
    ...
    Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

    From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

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    • DreamP346
      • Oct 2011
      • 2053

      I'm in the same boat. Media makes us believe that men are all sex hounds and women don't care for it so much. Like any other human characteristic, everybody has different libidoes. Most likely has nothing to do with you. Unless there are physicial causes like low testosterone, something he can get checked out. But just because he has a low drive, doesn't mean its abnormal.
      Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose - Kris Kristofferson and Fred Foster (sung by Janis Joplin)

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