[Em86]

I met my boyfriend back in 2011, he lives an hour an half from me. We both have a child from previous relationships, they are both the same age. We broke up after a year of being together, mainly to do with the distance. Nearly 3 months apart and we are back together, we really love each other and want to make it work. Things are better than before except one thing. The distance.
He says he cant move to me as its too far from his son which I understand. I cant move far as I have my daughter here and she is at school. I agreed to move half hour from where I am now to where my daughters dad lives as its a lovely town, great schools and I also have family there. This would then be just an hour from my boyfriends son, yet he still wont do it. Says its too much to drive every weekend to pick him up. Am I being unreasonable? I cant move any further than that, I have my daughter with me. His son lives with his mum and wouldnt be affected, he would still see his dad the same amount.
I just thought if you love someone you do what it takes to make it work. If he wont move and I cant move then what? We've been here so many times and broke up last time over it, we're so great together, we speak on the phone everynight, we have so much fun when we are together, we have shared so much and I dont want to loose what we have because of this distance issue
What would you do, I would like people's opinions from both sides.

[Guest]

He wants his cake and to eat it too.

Sounds like your relationship is pretty one sided. As long as you're willing to make the sacrifices, he's fine with that but as for him making any...not so much.

Your children, yours and his, have to come first - IMO. So uprooting either one makes no sense to me.

In the U.S. an hour and a half is nothing...If both adults in this relationship really wanted to make it work and were equally willing to make the necessary sacrifices to make it work, then it would work.

It is clear to me that one is and one isn't.

[Em86]

I didnt think an hour was alot, an hour to pick him up and an hour back for a whole weekend with him. They could make the journey fun. He said he will move 30 mins, 45min at most away from his son, whats an extra 15 mins or so? I cant take my daughter that far away from mine and her friends and family. Its not fair at all. I dont want to end this relationship because one of us is being stubborn or just doesn't want to move so far, which is him. It does make me have thoughts of if he really wants this relationship, he just seems happy in his little town and doesnt want to leave. He does still have a house with his ex to sell, but I dont think thats an issue. She lives there with their son for now. Its just so frustrating!

[Trisha23]

Try to open that issue again with him and tell him how you feel. It is not fair enough that only you will make an effort.