[Rlbutler89]

I admit I am an emotional person and can cry at the drop of a dime. I know my boyfriend lovea me and we are trying to start a family but sometimes I don't feel like he loves me. Yea I think there is a difference between knowing and feeling love. When I try to discuss feeling,emotions and our sex life he completely shuts me down. He changes the subject says I'm being stupid and calls me a drama queen? Its like he loves me but doesn't care how I feel or what I need/want from him and our relationship. Am I over reacting or do I have a right to be upset over this?

[tonypal]

I do not think it is that simple.
What brought this all on ?
Some men have difficulty dealing with a crying woman.
Or maybe he is unable to discuss what you want to discuss when you want to.
Maybe writing a note or an e-mail could start a dialogue.

[Rlbutler89]

I don't cry unless I'm just so fed up I can't take it anymore LOL. I've write him letters before BC that's my best way of expressing myself and I don't like confrontation at all. After a letter things will change for a few days then stop

[Euphoric]

I understand that you care for this guy, love him, and have probably invested a good bit of time with him. However, what I don't understand is why you would want to settle down and start a family with a man who belittle's you by calling you stupid and claiming you are a drama queen. Is this really the way you want to spend your life? Good relationships require a lot of hard work and give and take, but being in a relationship where your feelings are considered non-essential is going to be a constant uphill battle.

I'm not suggesting you leave him, but I am suggestioning you think long and hard before committing your life to a partner who doesn't seem to value your feelings, opinions, and needs as important. Too many people settle for what they perceive to be love, when in fact their partner is not willing to meet them half way.

I see red flags when you say that you find writing him letters are the best way of expressing yourself, and even then, he only "improves" for a few days before returning to his usual pattern. It is imperative that couples be able to communicate openly and honestly in a mature manner. And it is just as important to know that your partner not only hears you, but listens to you. I wish you the best of luck.

Euphoric

[caster]

After a letter things will change for a few days then stop

That gives me pause to ask, what are you trying to change?
If you are a very emotional, touchy feely, share your most inner thoughts type, and he's just a guy that goes through life one day at a time and doesn't care about all the drama, then you may have a compatibility problem. We can make ourselves listen, but we'll never change that much.
He may never be your BFF, he's your boyfriend, don't expect him to be able to connect with you the way a girl friend would.

[jns]

Many guys have trouble exploring emotions and will get angry to cover up their awkwardness.

[Trisha23]

I guess guys just don't like dramas. They just want to enjoy with their partner minus the drama.

[time2discover]

I have to agree with jns, not every man is able to express his feelings or emotions
like we do! Most of them will actaully think we overdo it.

If you really want to know, look at his actions in your relationship. He might not say it
but if he's there for you and participating in every day life as a partner, that should say
it all.

At the same time, try to be less insecure. Believe you're worth loving and soon you'll see it
without having to hear it from someone else all the time.

If you want to discuss things that need to be worked out like sex or whatever, go slowly and
mention the things that are bothering you in a casual way. Don't make him feel like this is
happening because of him but mainly that it's bothering you and you want to fix it with him
for the better of your relationship. He might just open up in time.