I would text her one more time. let her know you and BF can Start to " Help " move her on Saturday Morning. 8 AM to say 1 PM.
It should not take more than 5 hours for the Heavy Stuff and even allot of Small or Medium stuff. Ask if she has a U haul or Pickup or ( Trucks ) all arranged?
You can even offer a few hours to help pack on your Day Off ( Friday you said ) .
Tell her you need to know her Schedule ( for Packing and Moving ) by Tonight, so you can plan your day off and also for Saturday.
Explain that you have a Death of a Family Friend and that you and BF would like to have time to give him ( Grandson ) some support time on Saturday Afternoon/ Evening.
If she is a true Friend she will understand, she will appreciate the help you are offering her.
As for
I feel like I've got to stop investing time into helping her have a positive attitude and accept her for who she is. If that means I step back from the friendship, then so be it. I can't make her happy. She has to do it herself.
Buy her a House warming gift, like a Self Help Book or a Cook Book. When I say Self Help book, I mean one that is Upbeat and Productive. Like things to do when feeling Down or How to help others, even in small ways. I know a person that ties the Pink Ribbons for Breast Cancer Awareness, Rally's and Runs and meetings .
It seems that you are further in your " Recovery " from a Toxic Place and Toxic Friends.. Kudo's to you
Whatever you do, Do Not fall back into that Toxicity and do not let her Guilt you into feeling that you must "Prop her Up " and be her Only Friend.
You can offer to hold her hand through Recovery, But you cannot Drag her along, Kicking and Screaming . Nor can you allow yourself to be backtracked into Quicksand .
You do not at this Point have to End the Friendship, You do however have to set " Rules". For You, more than Her .
Hoping this weekend goes well for you .
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