[Ashlee T.]

Do you really want to settle for the consolation prize just because some things might be more difficult?

I feel this same way. I would not want to be the one chosen because the person my "lover" really wants might not work out. And I'm sure your guy wouldn't want to be that person either.

As I'm not one for labels, I don't see any difference in this situation than if this were another man you were interested in. I feel like when your heart wanders, (and I'm not just talking about a fleeting moment of lust or attraction) then the answer is already there. Does it mean she is the right one for you? No...definitely not. But it does mean that there's a good chance your boyfriend is not.