[angie23]

hi, i'm new to this and need some good advice, otherwise i just keep stressing out... ok, my b/f and i have been dating for a year and a half and we have a 4.5 month old daughter together. (He had been living with me since feb.) to make a long story short, he's 28 and i'm 23, and it seems like he's always broke!! we agreed to split things down the middle when he moved in, and lately, he can't hardly cover his share!! he works for this dumb bank of america call center and is underpaid. i am busting my ***, picking up overtime just so we can make it! h e bought our daughter diapers and formula only ONE time, and that is alll he EVER bought for her. i'm picking up his slack, he lost his truck, so he's using my car, he rather play videogames and be on the internet than go out to find an actual good job. He keeps saying he will, but all he does is just talk... i'm just real sick of it and feel like pulling out my hair b/c i just dont know what to do..... i do love him, but this is starting to get old.

the "deatbeat" part is b/c he didn't get me **** for valentines day, our one year, or my birthday..... you guessed it, b/c he was BROKE!!!!!WTF?

[Fallen1]

the "deatbeat" part is b/c he didn't get me **** for valentines day, our one year, or my birthday..... you guessed it, b/c he was BROKE!!!!!WTF?

I believe I could get past the fact I didn't get anything for b'day, valentines day etc. .... it's the fact that he doesn't help pay the bills and take care of his child that makes him a dead beat.

You need to sit him down and have a serious talk about taking on his responsibilities. If he can't, then you need to consider moving on.

Just my .02.

[misskitty3]

He keeps saying he will, but all he does is just talk... i'm just real sick of it and feel like pulling out my hair b/c i just dont know what to do..... i do love him, but this is starting to get old.

please, please, please cut him loose. easier said than done especially with a baby in the picture, but its the best advice i have.

my sis is also dealing with this, and she is pregnant right now. he had promised her the world, to take care of her and the baby...until 2 days ago when he tried to kill himself instead of actually taking action. (the cowards way out of responsibility) and he would sit around the house and playing his video games, watching tv, etc cause he hasn't worked at all... until she couldn't pay their electric bill. so i had to.

sell his game systems to cover your expenses. there is no reason for him to have luxuries when he can't take care of his child.

i'm so sorry you are going through this, and keep us updated on how you are doing

[Little]

misskitty3: it's hard when you're so close to the situation to see it, but attempted suicide is not an act of cowardice, it's a CRY FOR HELP.
You should have called the police. In most states, if you're admitted to the hospital for attempted suicide, you're forced to enter a mental hospital for a short time and get counseling. Looks like that guy needs it, and hey, if he was "just playing" (which I doubt) he will get the scare of a lifetime.

Angie23 - SELL HIS VIDEOGAMES. Sell any computer that isn't yours. YOU'RE earning your computer; he's causing you a deficit and his unnecessary goods are at risk.
And when he doesn't have them to play, maybe he'll decide instead to take an active role in the life of your child, rather than sit on the sidelines.

[misskitty3]

Little,

I completely understand the fact that he needs help. He has also been promising my sister to get some for about a year. I know depression, and I know suicide...his attempt seemed like a cry for help, but more like a drama queen move. He has been doing stuff like trying to get my sis to break up with him, instead of him just leaving b/c he is a coward....

I wasn't there, so I couldn't call the police but I agree that my sister should have. We're not even exactly sure what happened, b/c she found a bottle of anti-freeze in the kitchen next to a shot glass. So he obviously didn't drink enough to go to the hospital, and he obviously left it out on the counter for everyone to see what he'd been up to.

ugh! I don't know.....

but what I do know is that no one has to live like that. everyone is in control of their own lives and if you're unhappy do something about it. there is always an opportunity to do something. I wish this stuff wouldn't happen, but it does and we have to take care of ourselves, our family, and our children