[katzintheclouds]

Trust me, I am much better off without that BF of mine, he liked the idea of me liking women and our sexual relationship was amazing, but everything else was ****. I am very confident with my sexuality, I talk about it openly with people which I'm sure you know by now is hilarious sometimes. Some people don't get weirded out by it, other's just keep asking questions because they think it's insane you are so comfortable with it. I'm proud of myself for being this way and feeling the way I do, I always explain that I basically feel that the next person I'm in a relationship with could be either male or female, it's just about the person. That blows people's minds. I'm trying to secure jobs, I've applied to several in a few different place, I'm trying to visit Chicago soon because I have a possible job prospect and know some people out there. Perhaps my next source of advice would be on how the hell you move successfully by yourself!! Thanks so much for your support ladies.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I think you have to follow your dreams. We literally walk around this World with our eyes closed in other words, we exist we don't live.

Lot's of things in life are scary, moving alone is one of them BUT, it's exciting, adventurous and a new challenge.

I do think like you. I do think that this girl can't be married and have her cake and eat it too and you would be the second wheel as she is married. That was her choice, she choose to make that move in life.

When we are alone, we are off course lonely and attention is very welcoming, inviting and needed. We can be clouded by our judgement as a result but the amusing part is, we "always" know the answer it comes out of our mouths even but 9 out of 10 times, people choose to ignore it as a thought instead of intuition.

Good to see you back Katz

Now go live that life you are meant to and deserve and enjoy...

Don't ask me where to go, what would I know, I'm an Aussie

[Elena_EvilEye]

Trust me, I am much better off without that BF of mine, he liked the idea of me liking women and our sexual relationship was amazing, but everything else was ********. I am very confident with my sexuality, I talk about it openly with people which I'm sure you know by now is hilarious sometimes. Some people don't get weirded out by it, other's just keep asking questions because they think it's insane you are so comfortable with it. I'm proud of myself for being this way and feeling the way I do, I always explain that I basically feel that the next person I'm in a relationship with could be either male or female, it's just about the person. That blows people's minds. I'm trying to secure jobs, I've applied to several in a few different place, I'm trying to visit Chicago soon because I have a possible job prospect and know some people out there. Perhaps my next source of advice would be on how the hell you move successfully by yourself!! Thanks so much for your support ladies.

I wish more people had the attitude you have. If I may ask what job are you wanting to do?

[katzintheclouds]

I will definitely say that leaving that relationship of mine was a huge step that developed my strength, it was hard to leave something and go back to nothing for a while. I knew breaking up was best, but I had to leave my house, my pets, pack all of my things into boxes & shove them into my parents attic where I came crawling back at 28. It was hard. But I know I should be thankful now that I have no major attachments and really all I need is a network of a plan and some money. As much as I love her, I know she didn't choose to marry me so that's a sign, she chose him. We still need to talk because I think if tables were different and she was where I am and vice versa, she would be wishing she had me. In fact, if/when I do get into a relationship (man or woman) she'll probably miss what we could have had.

As far as a job, I have my BA degree and almost three years in public health so I'm pretty open. I plan on working towards a Master's degree when I get stable in something I really think I want to do but until I get there, I'm not getting into debt. If I could get stable somewhere, I think it would be great for me to leap out on my own. I'm young, I'm not married, I'm not in a relationship, I don't have kids, I dont have a house....what am I doing?

[Euphoric]

You're making calculated decisions, exploring all your options and not allow peer pressure or societal norms to govern what you do. Depending on where you find employment, they may encourage you to further your education and assist with tuition. Nobody wants to 'crawl back to mom and dad's house', but it takes guts to know when to say when and cut your losses - be that from cutting ties with the BF and/or the friend. What is important now is for you to find happiness and acceptance. Spread your wings and fly Katz.

[Motorguy]

I will definitely say that leaving that relationship of mine was a huge step that developed my strength, it was hard to leave something and go back to nothing for a while. I knew breaking up was best, but I had to leave my house, my pets, pack all of my things into boxes & shove them into my parents attic where I came crawling back at 28. It was hard. But I know I should be thankful now that I have no major attachments and really all I need is a network of a plan and some money. As much as I love her, I know she didn't choose to marry me so that's a sign, she chose him. We still need to talk because I think if tables were different and she was where I am and vice versa, she would be wishing she had me. In fact, if/when I do get into a relationship (man or woman) she'll probably miss what we could have had.

As far as a job, I have my BA degree and almost three years in public health so I'm pretty open. I plan on working towards a Master's degree when I get stable in something I really think I want to do but until I get there, I'm not getting into debt. If I could get stable somewhere, I think it would be great for me to leap out on my own. I'm young, I'm not married, I'm not in a relationship, I don't have kids, I dont have a house....what am I doing?

You seem to have good head on your shoulder Katz so I know you will figure it out soon. But you took that leap got away from that relationship some times you look back was it a good idea but you know it was. So good luck in your adventure what ever you do. I know you will figure it out soon enough and be back to being very happy again good luck and god bless.

[katzintheclouds]

Thank you everyone for your support.

I have been talking about this more and more with other close friends of mine who understand me as I am. I have explained to them all openly that I don't hide the way I feel about being bisexual, and surprisingly enough, the majority of them understand and accept me for it. I recently talked with a good friend of mine at dinner and explained the situation a bit more, in which she immediately asked me "What the heck are you doing? She's totally using you". That hurt a lot to hear that.

I have no idea how to talk to her about this, because I don't ever think we can just "be friends" without that sexual connection. That's what terrifies me the most.

[jen1447]

Nothing's that bad hon, just face up to it. You have to anyway, no point worrying.

Tell her you love her (as friends and romantically if so).
Tell her you feel a bit ill-used by the presence of her husband and the fact he doesn't know.
Tell her you're worried that your friendship will end if the sex part ends.
Tell her you want to explore the options - telling her husband and continuing, her leaving the hubs if she's invested enough in you, etc.

The only way is to take this head on!

[katzintheclouds]

I guess the truth is that I don't want to face up to it, but I think this time is a bit different because after that stunt on the 4th I've felt a little used and pretty much avoiding her contact. She's texted me a few times, I dont think we've actually talked. UGH!

I have to mention to that I've also had some other unfortunate situations in which case I allowed myself to be used, and that's just pitiful. I feel a bit like trash anymore which is FAR from what I am. I've allowed two ex boyfriends in the span of a few months creep back into my life. I think I've just been so desperate for attention.

Thank you for talking with me, it helps..

[jen1447]

Stop the "trash" talk, you're not that. We're all people hon and we have vulnerabilities. Who are these BFs and do you not want them around? We can get rid of them real quick, no worries.

We can also help devise a plan for this with your GF if you like. Probably first thing to do would be to sort out your thoughts, and the best way to do that is just wall-of-text it. (Believe it or not, most steady members here are caring people and will actually read walls of text if they know they're legit, so don't feel bad about it.)

So! I want to see a gigantic paragraph about how you feel about all this. Leave it all in, you're not writing a newspaper article so nothing gets cut. We'll help you process it all. Sound good?