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Feeling Guilty

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  • Feeling Guilty

    I am not sure if anyone's experienced this before, but I feel really guilty. I had a dream last night about someone I work with (I have absolutely NO feelings for them whatsoever) but I had a sex dream. I feel guilty about it, even though I know I shouldn't since you can't control your dreams, but I am just so bothered by it. I feel like I'm keeping something from my husband but I know if I told him he might get upset (his past girlfriends have cheated on him and I work in an almost all male workplace). How do I get past this crappy feeling? I am also worried I will have another dream like that. Granted, we watched a documentary on the different types of mating and births of animals last night (it was interesting lol) and I'm also pregnant so I've been having really odd dreams the way it is....but I just want to crawl in a hole because I'm so disgusted with myself!
    ~Catwoman~

  • Originally posted by catwoman View Post
    How do I get past this crappy feeling?
    You just need time to let your mind adjust to reality. I had a vivid dream like that about a girl I never had a relationship with that I hadn't seen in over 20 years last week. Don't fret about it and wait.

    Some real life loving with your man would probably help speed things along.
    "Those sowing seed with tears
    Will reap with a joyful shout." - Psalm 126

    Comment


    • Cat,

      You are correct, we can't control our dreams. Trust me, I wish I could for various reasons Hormones are all over the place during pregnancy and can have profound effects on a woman's mental and emotional state. Your body is going through a lot of complex changes. Neurons are rapidly firing and your brain is processing and trying to accommodate multiple signals at one time. These are very basic examples: Normally you love the smell of bacon and now it makes you sick, the thermostat is set on 70 degrees - which is customary - and now you are burning up and need to lower it to 60 degrees, you're normally satisfied having sex 3x per week and now you want it 3x per day. In those examples you have control: don't cook bacon, lower the thermostat, jump your man's bone(s) or open up the pleasure chest and have at it.

      I've had vivid dreams involving sex with men that, quite honestly, I don't and wouldn't necessarily find attractive. Upon waking, I thought, "where the heck did that come from. Eweee!"

      Is this your first pregnancy? If so, be prepared for all kinds of weird preferences and changes. Some are kind of cool while others are a pain in the butt. There's no need to tell your husband or feel guilty, weird things just happen sometimes, especially while pregnant.

      Euphoric

      Comment


      • I agree there's nothing to really feel guilty about ....guilt has to have some volition and your dreams kind of run themselves. If it still bothers you, probably the only thing that will fix it is to 'confess,' tho I don't think that's really necessary or even a good idea. But the only way to fix the secrets/lies anxiety is to get it in the open.
        [FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR="#800080"][B][SIZE=4]Woman trapped inside a woman's body![/SIZE][/COLOR][/B][/FONT]

        Comment


        • I feel better just getting it out here. Just to spill the beans to SOMEONE. Thanks
          ~Catwoman~

          Comment


          • Yeah, I almost came on here with my dream too because it really disturbed me. It wasn't just sexual. That I can deal with. It was a really powerful romantic feeling for someone else in my dream. I wanted to tell my wife, but I didn't want her to feel unnecessarily threatened.

            I just sucked it up and it passed.
            "Those sowing seed with tears
            Will reap with a joyful shout." - Psalm 126

            Comment


            • Originally posted by catwoman View Post
              I am not sure if anyone's experienced this before, but I feel really guilty. I had a dream last night about someone I work with (I have absolutely NO feelings for them whatsoever) but I had a sex dream. I feel guilty about it, even though I know I shouldn't since you can't control your dreams, but I am just so bothered by it. I feel like I'm keeping something from my husband but I know if I told him he might get upset (his past girlfriends have cheated on him and I work in an almost all male workplace). How do I get past this crappy feeling? I am also worried I will have another dream like that. Granted, we watched a documentary on the different types of mating and births of animals last night (it was interesting lol) and I'm also pregnant so I've been having really odd dreams the way it is....but I just want to crawl in a hole because I'm so disgusted with myself!
              I think that what happens when we sleep is all the things not sorted out take an abstract form. Dreams are a way to sort things out. I do not think that there is necessarily any real connection to conscious thought. I think your mind has had some abstract associations it wanted to thrash out and its way of doing that was a dream. Due to your recent changes in your body chemistry and what you were watching on TV, it made this a sex dream and the person a complete random choice. It could have just as easily been a stranger.

              I feel for you. I have had the same and I found it embarrassing, a feeling that someone was going to somehow know or find out, even though I understood it was impossible. I eventually gave myself an even break and said whatever goes on in my head is fine, so long as I don't act on it or spill. Now I have guilt free revenge fantasies on exes.

              Hang in there. I think it is good to vent here.

              Comment


              • I had a really vivid sexual dream about a female co-worker once before too. I was not attracted to her in the slightest. I think your dream was innocent and that telling your husband will make him worry about something that is illusory.
                [B]"Are you serious? You're [i]bleeping[/I] THAT girl?"[/B][B] - [COLOR="#B22222"]jen1447[/COLOR][/B]

                Comment


                • Ohhh girl I am continually dreaming something crazy. Sex with random people, murders (where I'm the killer!!!!). etc etc. 9 times out of 10, my dreams are no reflection of what I'd do in reality. At one time at a previous work place I would have periodic dreams about guys at work, not even people I was even remotely attracted to! You have done NOTHING wrong and it would be crazy to bring something like that up to your husband if you know it's just going to increase his insecurities. You're just a normal woman who loves her husband, so don't sweat it.
                  "Be what you're looking for."

                  Comment


                  • I'm with BD.

                    If I were held to account for the content of all of my dreams I would be alone or in jail.

                    And for the guys, have you ever been asked by the woman lying next to you what that wet dream was all about?
                    I do not grow old; if I stop growing, I am old.

                    Comment


                    • Anybody ever make a freaky dream a reality? (Not the murders lol, moreso the sex stuff.)
                      [FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR="#800080"][B][SIZE=4]Woman trapped inside a woman's body![/SIZE][/COLOR][/B][/FONT]

                      Comment


                      • Reality, no. Virtual reality…somewhat...

                        Comment


                        • Virtual ....well that certainly opens up lots of possibilities, doesn't it?
                          [FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR="#800080"][B][SIZE=4]Woman trapped inside a woman's body![/SIZE][/COLOR][/B][/FONT]

                          Comment


                          • Yes, Jen, it does.

                            As a matter of fact, that's a topic worthy of its own thread under the sex category so as not to derail the OP's question, don't you think?

                            Comment


                            • A freaky sex dreams (come true?) thread? Sounds good to me!
                              [FONT=Trebuchet MS][COLOR="#800080"][B][SIZE=4]Woman trapped inside a woman's body![/SIZE][/COLOR][/B][/FONT]

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