[CHANDLERS WISH]

That was a "white rose bud", but probably had bugs on it as well!!!!!

[just4me]

Hi Just4me, well to be honest, i think it is important to talk things through more, as that way you get rid of each and every negative, turning them into positives until there are no more to talk about because your over it. (Or is that the other way around?)

But, telling her is i don't know, acting in "revenge", he hurt me i am **** well going to make sure that other's know! And, what if she doesn't listen, you wouldn't know, he loves me...... you were just...
Then you'll feel okay, that was no point.

He could have told her that she is like a white rose bug that he wished he had picked before... ( I like that one, i might use that for my new man, it just came out) And, she may be at the beginning stages, like you were, not where you are now, not ready to hear....

So, (opinion), unless she seeks you and asks you, then just keep going down your path of forgetting him.

Don't be too hard on that last post either, she has a lot of hurt as well to get over, if you read her Thread, it is evident that she is perhaps angry and blaming the woman in her instance and let go with a bit of that anger on you.

Not saying it was right, as it certainly wasn't and hopefully she will see that herself.

Changed your mobile yet? Well just reminding you.....

Your right Chandler, it is revenge and not worth it. That probably will take more energy for me to do than to just forget about him. And then what if I find out more, that I really do not want to know...ugh just setting myself up for more heartbreak than he has already given me.

Point taken on post I made to seeking32...I totally agree.

That was funny the white rose bud with ugly bugs...LOL good one Chandler.

Yes I called about my mobile number today and I have to go in and do it in person so I will be doing it Monday on my lunch hour. I fell last night and hurt my ankle and didnt feel like doing much today.

Thank you you for your thoughts and your opinion...much appreciated.

[C]

No, I would never tell her....You see this wife could have been me...A woman came after my husband knowing that he was married and was waiting in a hotel for him. I just found out about this about 10 months ago..This happened in his early 50's....He is really quite a guy....I have never been as shocked and scared in my life as when I found this out and asked him if he went....

This happening has affected my relationship with my husband as I now realize so many things about women and life...I now look at the lonely other woman and the wife that is not enough on her toes to keep him sexually happy.....I have found that a man does not think as a woman...They love but the word love means something else to them then it does to a woman....Most women think eternity and a great deal of men think with a hard on......I have found that usually when a man is sexually happy at home that he does not wander but the secret is finding that sexual happiness...I lucked out...

With you all that has happened, happened because it was supposed to happen.....He was on the prowl and you greeted him with an open heart...You, my dear, now are a complete woman and your eyes are now opened to the wonder of love and man......Cherish what you have learned and smile when you think of it....You are one of the lucky ones.

Now just have a wonderful life....All my love to you, xox Caroline

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Your right Chandler, it is revenge and not worth it. That probably will take more energy for me to do than to just forget about him. And then what if I find out more, that I really do not want to know...ugh just setting myself up for more heartbreak than he has already given me.

Point taken on post I made to seeking32...I totally agree.

That was funny the white rose bud with ugly bugs...LOL good one Chandler.

Yes I called about my mobile number today and I have to go in and do it in person so I will be doing it Monday on my lunch hour. I fell last night and hurt my ankle and didnt feel like doing much today.

Thank you you for your thoughts and your opinion...much appreciated.

See your seeing things differently already, i never said that the bug was "ugly" lol..... But now i do

And try not to drink so much, then you won't fall down... only joking...

Have no doubt you'll go in circles with thoughts for a few weeks, it's natural, what if, should i, i did it for a while before i walked.....

Funny though for me, one thing i didn't consider is that i own more, and spent more on us, bugger me that he wants now to sign out of a commercial deal providing i pay him, what's with that???? Yet, where i am now in my life, i simply am smiling, so what...........

Be free and enjoy...

[just4me]

Today was a pretty good day for me and how I'm feeling. It's been 8 days since i've talked to him....that is HUGE for me. We've never gone this long without any kind of communication. I just wish I didn't think of him so much. I hope that goes away too. I mean I know i'll always think of him just hopefully not so much in the future. And that each day is going to get easier for me.

I want to get past these feelings of missing him so much . There are times when its not necessarily so much of missing him, but then there are times when I miss him so much I hurt. I know this is all normal.
Wow I sound kind of contradictory there.

I keep telling myself how bad this relationship is/was. Many many reasons to stay away. All on the list. Just have to get past these missing him feelings. I miss a certain side of him that I don't think many others got to see of him. We could talk at time so well and have an awesome time together and thats the part I miss....

Oh well I know I have to let go, totally. One day at a time.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Today was a pretty good day for me and how I'm feeling. It's been 8 days since i've talked to him....that is HUGE for me. We've never gone this long without any kind of communication. I just wish I didn't think of him so much. I hope that goes away too. I mean I know i'll always think of him just hopefully not so much in the future. And that each day is going to get easier for me.

I want to get past these feelings of missing him so much . There are times when its not necessarily so much of missing him, but then there are times when I miss him so much I hurt. I know this is all normal.
Wow I sound kind of contradictory there.

I keep telling myself how bad this relationship is/was. Many many reasons to stay away. All on the list. Just have to get past these missing him feelings. I miss a certain side of him that I don't think many others got to see of him. We could talk at time so well and have an awesome time together and thats the part I miss....

Oh well I know I have to let go, totally. One day at a time.

That's great.

I know you have a child, 10 i think of by memory, just wondering if you can start to get out a bit now, and mingle so you can experience other interections as a single woman. Also, if someone flirted with you a touch that would help i think start to assist in forgetting about him.

Sitting on your own daily, and night, would make it harder.

Just a thought.

[just4me]

That's great.

I know you have a child, 10 i think of by memory, just wondering if you can start to get out a bit now, and mingle so you can experience other interections as a single woman. Also, if someone flirted with you a touch that would help i think start to assist in forgetting about him.

Sitting on your own daily, and night, would make it harder.

Just a thought.

Oh I flirt all the time. I work with tons of men, so lots of opportunities there, lol. I have always been a huge flirt..I have been doing alittle more getting out and it is helping a bit. My son is with his dad this week on spring break, so I am home alone and its kind of hard for me at times.

Today is a rough day. I'm having little crying, feeling sorry for myself moments. And missing him even more so today than yesterday but I am getting thru it. My ex-husband is my best friend and he told me to just call him...I was like huh???? Are you kidding me, then he said I was only going to see what you would say...do not contact him. He only said it because he hates to see me upset and hurting and he says he has seen how at times I was very happy with the jerk but he has also seen all the crying times too. He has lots of names for him, lol.

Anyway its another day, may not have been as great yesterday but its another day and I will get thru it. They say everyday gets easier,,,well ok I need that to happen and soon....That old saying "patience is a virtue"...I for sure need that now. I can be very impatient at times especially when I am hurting. Gotta keep reminding myself I am a good person and deserve so much better. It just hurts when I think of him with someone else and all the things he said to me that I know he will say to the next one and the next one.

Pfffffffffffft!!! Gotta stop that now....Gotta keep smiling and moving.

[Fallen1]

Today is a rough day. I'm having little crying, feeling sorry for myself moments. And missing him even more so today than yesterday but I am getting thru it.

I have not commented until now but I wanted to let you know that I have been reading your posts and keeping up.

I'm so sorry you are having a rough day. Keep your chin up and know there are people here that care and are rooting for you.

Just remember you're doing the right thing and what's best for you.

[just4me]

I have not commented until now but I wanted to let you know that I have been reading your posts and keeping up.

I'm so sorry you are having a rough day. Keep your chin up and know there are people here that care and are rooting for you.

Just remember you're doing the right thing and what's best for you.

Fallen, thank you so much for your encouraging words. They mean so very much to me. Becoming a member of this site has helped me so much. I read what people have said to me, but also other posts as well and its all helped me tremendously. In the past I would never have been able to make it this long without breaking down and contacting him, but with the help of all of you here and my therapist I am doing it, one day at a time.

Again thank you tons. And yes I am doing whats best for me and my heart.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Now there's an envy i bet. An ex-husband that you get along with that you can also talk to and that makes jokes to make you smile...sheezzz..

Sounds to me like your calling all " good vibes " and there they are people from everywhere "rooting for you" that was a nice comment from Fallen.

I'm a bit of a believer about "The Universe" ask and you shall get, put it out there.

I think what i admire about you is your strength.

You are bold and have a "can do" approach and your not afraid to express your feelings, or your thoughts.

That strength and courage can only take you further to that good place.

As for flirting, gee, i'm a shocker to...lol. It's good for you though, honest, true, !!!! Na, i meant that.

I'm starting to count with you, what's with that? 9?

Keep strong, when your done, teach me i need it for giving up smoking......