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Cant stop fantasizing about married man

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  • Cant stop fantasizing about married man

    I'm single, 23 and have been fantasizing about a plastic surgeon that I went to have a keloid removed from my ear. I didn't know how young or attractive this doctor was- I had scheduled my consultation and surgery all in the same day. As soon as the doctor walked into the consultation room, it's like I reached an epiphany. I was immediately refreshed and in awe of his appearance and they way he
    conducted himself. It was so weird to me, I had never been stunned my someone so instantly before in my life. He had a little bit of grays at the top of his head but I could tell he was very young. He's only been practicing for 3 years so he's relatively new to practicing. Considering medical school and residency he has to be about 35. I have had to go in to see him for 6 appointments total for follow ups after the surgery and steroid injections in my ear to prevent the keloid from coming back. The first appointment I had with him (the day of the surgery) he was very comfortable with me and seemed very genuinely happy. When we would make eye contact we couldn't really help but to smile or light up. When I left that day I was "happy high" for the rest of the day and told my friends/family just how impressed I was with this man... next appointment we were once again, very happy to be around each other. He's always making jokes trying to make me laugh and hold crazy good eye contact that really just turns me on. During the second appointment he said something about his funky tie and that his daughter picked it out. He also said something about how his wife is 5 foot on a good day and that he's always looking down because there is always toys all over the floor and that she's always lookin up (obviously because she's short). I'm really not sure how that came into our conversation at all. When I'm around him I'm shy, but not too shy. My voice is noticeably higher and I'm noticeably more happy and at such ease to be in his presence. He is tall and is the most attractive and pleasant man I have even met. I didn't believe that I even had a type until I met him. He's the perfect combination of everything I ever wanted, and still even more. He has the most genuine smile, he's refined like a prince, he's a truly kind person, patient, humble, incredibly smart and a great doctor, corny and nerdy (I love it and am in school to become a pharmacist), and just overall so incredible. He always impresses me.

    I am not 100% sure if he know that's I'm in Pharm school. We are very similar in the most beautiful ways. Our sense of humor is a bit nerdy yet we are very well refined people. I am an attractive woman, I'm 5'3, petite, with strawberry blonde hair. He is always complimenting my hair. We always break a genuine smile when we make eye contact. I am so at ease with him and he's more than 10 years older than me! I have dates older guys before and the last man I "saw" was 32. I love older men but I've never liked someone past 10 years in our age gap.

    One of the times I was at his practice, I said something about how I've been trying to wear my hair up since he removed the keloid from my ear but it's been hard for me because I was always so used to wearing my hair down to cover the keloid. He said "yeah my wife has a middle part and when she tries to wear her hair different ways it's goes this way and that way, it's just looks horrible"

    (woah) I didn't know if he brought up his wife because maybe he wanted me to back off (even though I never feel like I came off like that- I'm so shy/gentle around him) or if he brought her up to tell me there was something about her that he thought was unattractive?

    I wouldnt think it's ok to tell another women that your wife's hair looks horrible?

    Anyways, one of the times I was in there, the tension was so strong I swear I was aroused right then and there. We made googley eyes at each other the whole time I was there. And his secretary comes back into and out of the room (she always does) and I can only imagine how uncomfortable it was for her. I just fall for him every time I see him. It's natural and I don't want it to happen of course because he's married. I would never want to intervene in a marriage and I have Fantasized about going back to see him in the future(because I am scared to go back now that all my appointments for my keloid are over with) and him possibly being divorced so I can be with him. I feel so dumb saying this. I am very mature for my age this usually would never happen to me, but we can't help who we are attracted to.

    so on the most serious note, I fantasize about him sexually.... all the time. I orgasmed the very first time I was touched when I was younger about 18, and from then I never was able to orgasm again until I met this doctor. I think about him ALL The time. I think of light conversations with him, really wanting to get to know him, being there for him, surprising him with sexy lingerie and showing him just how I desire him. I think of made up scenarios in my head of how sex is initiated. I get excited when I see pictures of hotel beds or spas on Groupon and my mind immediately goes into fantasy mode. I orgasm to the though of him all the time (already twice today and probably a total of 8 times this week). It's hard for me to focus on anything else. It's hard for me to get my school work done. I'm not attracted to any other males like I am to him. The thoughts have been going on for 6 MONTHS. Part of me feels crazy for it and the other part of me loves that I have someone to think about and have ugh mind blowing orgasms to on my own. I only want him. I'm not attracted to other men. He is one hell of a man and I can't get him off my mind.

    I guess I just need to hear what someone thinks about this. I've actually told my Counseler and I saw it on her face... she got offended and turns out her husband is actually a doctor. She told me girls do this all the time and the doctors don't actually like their patients.

    I'm not an idiot. I am a woman with intuition. This man is just as googley over me as I am over him. I feel in love with him. I'm on another level when I think about him, like I'm on a drug. He's truly incredible and I could never even think up one negative thing to say about him

  • fantasy is what it is and it's ok to fantasize but I would not make up a reason to go back to Dr just to see him

    many Drs do have good table side manners and that's just who they are; they try to make pts feel comfortable and at ease
    I even had one touch my arm and I recognized it for what it was, putting me at ease
    we just had our child at a professional, who is very good looking, also.....he was all smiles, and joking, hi fiving our kid to put at ease
    it's what they do, what they are good at, helping put people at ease
    (not everyone, you know the ones who are super serious and would never crack a smile)

    when visiting a professional who is good looking, nice teeth, great at the jokes and table side manner, remember they are doing their job and they are the exact same way with the next patient, sorry to say no patient is more special than the next

    since you are going to be a pharmacist, I'm sure you've already learned about professionalism, ethics etc


    • Welcome Peaceoverall!

      Here’s my experience: About 90-95% of my clientele are women. I regularly see and spend time with them, often alone, and frequently personal and intimate details of their lives come up.

      The reasons I talk about my wife or my faith is to discreetly let them know that no matter how nice I am, how horny they are, or how clearly I can see their breasts through their see-through top, I’m unavailable and I don’t want them that way. Whatever they have in their heads or think they see or hear from me that says otherwise is not real.

      If a man has interest, he’s probably not going to keep bringing up his daughter and wife. Some of my clients know somewhat negative stuff about my wife – troubles with her reproductive system, issues with her hair, struggles finding clothes, problems with her family. I’m giving this information to relate to them while making sure the interaction doesn’t go in the wrong direction, not to somehow encourage them into thinking they could come between us.

      I’m a firm believer that we can control our thoughts and feelings. We can bring in the positive and put away the negative. In my book, coming between someone and their mate and messing up their family is negative. I’d put it out of my head.
      "Those sowing seed with tears
      Will reap with a joyful shout." - Psalm 126


      • Well, Sweetie, I really don't think you're in love with him. You're in love with the idea of him, with who he seems to be, who you think he is and how he makes you feel. Not uncommon and not alarming, but it is something that you need to manage and begin to move past now, otherwise you are setting up a pattern for yourself that could be unhealthy and prohibit your progression on to a healthy relationship.

        Fantasies and infatuation are part of life, especially as we are younger i think. This has been going on a long time. He's handsome, successful, has good sense of humor and personality, and he turns you on. It has all the makings of a daydreamy love story. But the reality is, you're his patient. It is inappropriate for anything more to happen.

        I don't think, from what you shared, that this man has any interest in pursuing a relationship outside the professional one you have. Doctors have a professional obligation, to make you feel comfortable, and to provide quality care.
        Sometimes we just have good chemistry with someone, doesn't mean they have any interest in crossing boundaries.

        I hope you're able to move past this. I fear you'll be held back from progressing in new relationships due to this infatuation.

        And as Stillness mentions above; would you really be interested in dating a married man?


        • I had a crush on a teacher once. I thought he was the business, but I didn't even know him personally. I built an image of what he was in my own mind. It was a fantasy, pure and simple. I've moved on now and know a crush is just a bit of fun and not worth obsessing over. You'll realize the same, in time. It is great to have a crush, but you need to be realistic, too.


          • I think your reading too much in his conversation & behaviour, believing it to be more than it is because you like him & want to feel that he likes you too.
            He's a professional who's trying to ensure your happy & at ease whilst in his care, as any Doctor would. I doubt he has any interest in pursuing a relationship with you, other than Dr/patient.
            Most married men generally don't mentioned their wife/kids if they are trying to pick up another woman, it's not the greatest chat up line.
            You need to be careful, you could seriously jeopardize this man's fledgling career & i doubt he'd thank you for that.


            • Men and women fantasize about sex about every thirty minutes. Fantasy and acting on it are two distinct concepts.

              My advice is to find a suitable outlet for your fantasy lest it becomes an obsession.



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