My boyfriend and I have been together for 8 years. He is so sweet, considerate, and is my best friend. Over the years I seem to go though waves of doubt for our relationship for some reason. Recently I moved away and we are trying the long distance thing. He is planning on moving up in a few months to be with me BUT it gives me anxiety thinking about it. He is ready for marriage and has expressed that. I on the other hand feel that I should be single one last time but then I think why? I already found an amazing guy who loves me plus we already have been together for so long. I do want to be single but I don't want to break his heart and loose my best friend. Do I continue to try and fight through longing to be single and make our relationship work. Maybe I'm just afraid of commitment?
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Have you gone to a counselor to help you sort out the thoughts and feelings you have?
From what little you shared, it seems to me that you should be single and get this sorted out, so there's no doubts when and if you decide to marry.
In general, I think if you have any desire to be away from him, to be single, it's a pretty good indicator that you're not ready for marriage. Whether that's due to a fear of commitment or something else, it still means you are not ready.
Get some time to yourself, speak with a counselor or someone else that is unbiased and capable of giving you support and useful advice. -
I would advise you not to agree to marry him: whenever you're in doubt HOLD BACK. Don't feel you must go through with something you're unsure about. Stop the ball rolling while you can. Don't be pleasing out of guilt. Be honest with yourself. Only you know your feelings and wants. Search for your true feelings and don't lie to yourself. That's all I can advise.
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