[silvertae]

These guys are either complete and total inconsiderate a*sholes and you ladies should leave them without any more thought OR they have Madonna/Wh*re complexes that they seriously need to work their way through NOW. Sometimes a guy who is really into porn, and the sometimes degrading ways that women are treated in such films, initially really enjoy lots of sex or kinky sex with a girl BEFORE he really begins to care about her. Then once he develops feelings for her he begins to think that he can no longer engage in such acts without feeling guilty, as if she now doesn't deserve to be treated that way. You switch from being the wh*re that he loved having sex with, to the madonna figure that he just can't bring himself to defile anymore. Some guys just can't think of sex as being an important part of a loving relationship. If you think this is the kind of problem he has, then he needs to get into counseling to sort it out, otherwise you'll never regain a functional sex life.

Dan Savage discusses this complex many times on his "Savage Love" podcasts, which are totally awesome and everyone should listen to.

Otherwise, if the guy is just a piece of sh*t human being, then DTMFA (another Dan Savage line, meaning "dump the motherf*cker already").

[Davey]

what if you and you're boyfriend have sex constantly, have a really erotc furlong sex life, but he still masturbates sometimes, even after multiple sex sessions? Is he weird. (serious question, just curious)

[Davey]

fulfilling*

[silvertae]

what if you and you're boyfriend have sex constantly, have a really erotc furlong sex life, but he still masturbates sometimes, even after multiple sex sessions? Is he weird. (serious question, just curious)

No, as long as the masturbation isn't interfering in the couple's sex life together, I see nothing wrong with masturbation. This topic is still being discussed in the "bf who's addicted to masturbation" thread on the sex board if you want to see more opinions there.

[anonymouswhitefemale]

what if you and you're boyfriend have sex constantly, have a really erotc furlong sex life, but he still masturbates sometimes, even after multiple sex sessions? Is he weird. (serious question, just curious)

I'd like a woman to tell me that I couldn't, or that that was weird, just so that I could laugh in her face until she realised how ridiculous she was, and walked out with her head hung in shame.

[8842angela]

Well I'm not married and dont know if I ever will be at this rate. There are worse things in life I suppose than never having sex or never being married??? I have many times thought this whole Madonna vs. Wh*** thing may play a role in why my bf has this libido problem. During our last blowout over this he said if I was "submissive" it might help. Unfortunately, I am about the most NON-submissive girl I know. What would a submissive girl do or say in the heat of the moment? I have also been enlightened recently that he has been smoking pot daily (multiple times) the entire time we have been dating. He has told me he hasn't (not that I was ragging on him to) but apparently that never lasted long. He has been using pot to "relax" for about 12 years now. Maybe that has killed the libido part of his brain? I dunno. I have basically not asked and not made it a viable option (single mom = VERY rare alone time and even less if the mom is in a sex starved funk) Should there actually be any alone time though and he tries to crawl up on me I'de check myself and give it a try like I always do. Yeah- the counseling thing? He wont do it. Too embarassing I guess.

[8842angela]

silvertae

I'de love to read what Dan Savage has to say on the Who** versus Madonna debate. Do you have a link?

[myteddy14me]

omg

tHAT IS SO HORRIBLE. hOW COULD YOU LET YOURSELF GO THROUGH THAT? wELL i AM NOT JUDGING YOU AT ALL But this is so sad. A man that does this seriously needs to seek help. You fell to inlove with him because you sit there letting him do it and its gone long enough to where you have to speak to him about it for it to stop and yet it doesn't. Well I think Everyone else pretty much pin-pointed it, you should let him go and remain friends until he grows out his little dimension.

[LOWERC1]

Blow Him Away

Move on. Why would you want to just sit by and wait for him to pleasure himself? What's the point of being in a relationship if you aren't sharing everything? He obviously does not need you to make him feel good. Find someone that is better for you. Good luck.

[sassie]

Well I don't really know what to say but do you find that things have changed with you over the year of your relationship. Are you there for him?? Do you listen when he talks to you??? Have you changed your appearance that would make him look in another direction?? Have you lost or gained weight?? Is there anything you could think of that would have changed the way things are besides what you have already mentioned.I don't really know what to say I just have a couple of friends going through kind of the same situation and when we all sit down and talk these are some of the things that come up about why the men are not happy and the sex isn't happening. Just think outside the box and see if there is a deeper issue that is causing this in your relationship. Good Luck