[Passion]

okay, so it has been about three weeks and I have been bumping into him often on the street. One time He was driving next to him and it was bumper to bumper I saw him but pretended not to I know he noticed me as he was just in the next lane. He asks me how I am doing and I tell him good. So then I ask him and he says good. But yesterday he asked me twice the first time I answered I was doing good the second time I told him I was happy that he was happy and then just said goodbye and left. I have been struggling hard with my emotions but I don't let him see me down. I think I have been doing a good job in taking care of myself and when he sees me I am dressed nice. I miss him so much last time I had to restrain myself from hugging him but every time I look at him I wonder if he slept with her and I think about he no longer is in love with me. I have been going to therapy and it feels okay but it only lasts about two hours which then I start to break down because I realize that this is really happening. I often feel so alone even when I am around people.

[WildChild]

it's going to take some time to adjust to this. Be good to yourself, dress nice for you, not him. Find positive, productive ways to stay busy.

[elsa_niloo]

oh my sweetie

I can't even try to imagine how hard it is for you seeing him and then wondering if he has slept with her or not. All i can tell you that is to hate him. He is a man that does not deserve your love, attention or care.

I wish you the best love.
stay strong and concentrate on you. Make sure your life runs around you and not him.

[Joy]

Hey Passion,


All the what if's are hard.... try not to torture yourself to much. I hope you are being good to yourself each day. Regardless how this all turns out putting time into yourself is always worth it.

lots of love to ya!

[happy ending]

i agree with the other posters, its horrible at the moment but honestly it will get better. keep doing things for yourself and going to therapy, you will have good days and more of them. just stay strong.

[WildChild]

Got to disagee with Elsa, hating is never healthy. It will keep you invested in the relationship and your ego. You want to move on not get stuck in an ugly emotion. You get what you send out, although it may not always feel like it. Feeling anger or frustration should be just a brief stage in your journey of healing. You have to own your responsibility for the situation, you were half of the relationship and stuck around and waited until it got to this point. Neither of you is wholly wrong or right. Work on letting go of it.

[Passion]

I don't think I could ever hate him. He was an important part of my life one that I will never forget I had a lot of good times with him. I learned so much from him, how to live, how to do things that you fear doing. He taught me how to love. I will never hate him. I do agree that maybe I had some part of the blame to this but I was always ready and eager to work it out. We have been talking and the last time we talked he told me that if I wanted him to grow I needed to let him go. I told him it was hard for me as he was the love of my life but he did not feel that I supported him in his dreams. He wants to put his all into his art and did not want me to sacrifice anymore for him. Yes, I did see and I still do see it as him leaving me behind as something in the past. Although I don't understand him and his decision and I can't bear to see him leave I have no choice, he has given me no choice. all I can hope for is that he will never forget me as someone very special to him that contributed to his growth although he no longer felt that we were growing together. I also believe that no matter how many other women he dates, they will never be me and he will know this and learn that I did everything possible to help him, and that I gave him all of my love. So hopefully he will always think of me as something beautiful that happened to him although he does not see that yet.

[Guest]

be angry for sure, not hate as you never know what the future holds.
you have every right for anger, yuo are validated so keep that in mind.
you were together a long time and now need to adjust to a new style of life without him. your not used to that and you have to for now.
hide your emotions from him and try to enjoy the company of others when your with them.
you have to stand strong and it will be hard but will get easier in time.
good luck.

[Passion]

Thank you all for your words of encouragement. I will try to be strong it is hard and I often fall but I am so lucky to have friends that are willing to be there for me to catch me and help me stand up again.