[Cerritos]

You need help.

Miss Oh There You Are... you don't feel you are wasting your life away sitting in front of a screen, as an adult, playing a game? You have no respect for your marriage as you overtly brag about your 8 online cheating romances? Why don't you just end the marriage before you opt to deceive? I'm not trying to knock you or the game, I just really am a confused Wow-er, in that this really is an enlightening experience because I had no idea why my BF never called me back, after professing such love and future together... then nothing. And because there was significant location distance and not one argument, it all seemed to be my "happily ever after." And then the coward can't even call to end it? I am only left to assume that the game sucked him away, only because his affliction with gaming the moment he woke up or walked in the door from work until he could just barely keep his eyes open, usually 1-3am. It's sad but very theraputic to read these posts only because I had no answer as to why I've not heard from my future partner, but now it seems to all make sense. I appreciate the supportive and the insightful views on these blogs. It's making me get over this 40 yr old DR. Loser. It's actually making me laugh for the first time in weeks, I just never knew...

[WildChild]

OhThereYouAre simply quoted WoWgirl, he is not the one addicted to gaming but was commenting that she needs help.

[Little]

We do NOT allow attacks to other members on these threads.
I could go through this thread and replace every instance of "World of Warcraft" with "alcohol" and every "gamer" with "drinker," and I feel like it would be less shocking, but no less sad. People get addicted to things every day, different things, because of their different preferences. There are a million possibilities. Some are addicted to substances, to people, to bad relationships, to their parents, to their siblings, to porn, to sex. We see a million reason why relationships fail on this board, but if you read enough you begin to see:
A. that there are certain things that can salvage a relationship. Time, communication, etc, and
B. that there are some people out there who engage in relationships they don't INTEND to salvage. These people must be given up on, or interacted with in a different manner, as sad as it is.

[brad24ca]

Hope this helps

Hope this helps you a little bit, it might help you get inside the mind of a player.

Well first off the aim of the game is to get to maximum level and get items and gold. How do you do this? You have to spend massive amounts of time. You start to get more and more into it. You have tasks and chores in the game to complete and your mind can't rest until it's all done. It's always on your mind. There is always new content added so it never ends. Like a carrot on a stick in front of a horses mouth.

You spend massive amounts of time doing repetitive things. (For people who don't play and want it translated, it's like taking a pencil, drawing a circle on the wall, and tapping it for 8 hours a day 7 days a week.) This makes the player frustrated, irritable and body and eyes sore from sitting for long periods of time. When people try to hinder them or stop them it makes them more upset, they want to get this stuff done because there is limited time and they don't want to be interupted. They also want to get better then the other players so they can be admired and respected. When they are away from wow they still think about it and the things they need to complete. Some players know about the massive amounts of time they put into it but pretend they don't play alot because admitting it would be admitting they have a problem. However using the "/played" command on all the characters a player has never lies. After awhile they play so much they forget about what they used to do in their free time before they played the game.

To those who have never played, here is an example. It's like you having to do house work and cleaning that will take 8 hours to do in 1 hour because guests are arriving and having someone ask you... are you done yet? Are you done yet? Are you done yet? Are you done yet? Lets go out and get ice cream, lets rent a movie. Thats the way it feels to the person playing the game. The player feels the game is most important when really real life is most important.


Hope that helps.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Thanks Brad for your insight.

It's actually very clever of them.. They are Millionairres .. They prey on the weak... Or those whom like challenges... How can one stop? It never ends.

Reading this thread breaks my heart. Especially, the lady who said she has had 8 relationships with players...

The addiction is REAL... Very real......

It's worse in my opinion or equal, than Pokie players, they lose their money and therefore, their lives and their marriages. So do Wow addicted people.......

CW

[Gahzilla]

*shrinks into the thread*

I play WoW. I have been playing for about 4.5 years. I also function as a person. I have a job, 2 kids, an apartment, a cat, an absent husband (pretend he's still here for the illustration) and I make wow my last on list priority. Dinner comes before raiding. Grocery shopping comes before questing. Logging on to farm for mines or make elixirs/flasks can be done any time, but family and providing for them, spending time with them etc always comes first!!!!

My husband and I played it together for a long time, we really enjoyed it. He got promoted, and quit. I still play off and on when time allows, but one thing I found about it that I thought was pretty awesome: I have a LOT of friends I went to high school with play as well, so it 's a fun little deal if you have a non-addicting personality. The problem lies in when people can't walk away or heck, even judge a moral issue in game. Your cartoons aren't flirting with other cartoons, you are flirting with the other player. Even when he played, I NEVER allowed one single person to flirt with me, not even as a joke. It was very uncomfortable and I didn't want the disrespect shown to me or my husband.

Like all things, WoW should be regulated heavily if you are an addictive person, if you are a non addictive person or have your priorities pretty much straight, playing it can be relaxing and fun - as it's intended. It's when you play 40+ hours a week and neglect everything else is when it needs to be pulled completely.

If you have an addict that is playing it, uninstall the game and let them know that it's not a personal thing, you just need the computer being used for better things.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Like all things, WoW should be regulated heavily if you are an addictive person, if you are a non addictive person or have your priorities pretty much straight, playing it can be relaxing and fun - as it's intended. It's when you play 40+ hours a week and neglect everything else is when it needs to be pulled completely

Don't shrink.. You've stated what we all say... It's an addiction... And, if you can do it for fun, then fantasic, your not an addict... but that is not what the creators soley wanted, they need your type too... They wanted the addicts.

Good reply.

CW

[cloverleaf]

I'm truely sorry to hear a game is taking precidence over your marriage. Many people have replied with what I was thinking, there are other problems at work here. I'm heading into the same boat as you. Good luck I hope everything works out.

[jalapeno]

Warcraft Marriage Warcraft Divorce

I sympathise and understand your situation entirely. Warcraft is structured in such a way to make it addictive, requiring more and more user input to maintain status. My wife plays warcraft for 8 or 9 hours a day, she started playing about 2 years ago after our 10 year old son took an interest in it. The difference is, my son can take it or leave it, my wife however, cannot. During the last two years she has become a completely changed person, neglecting our son, neglecting the day to day responsibilities of our marriage, and conducting her life and converstations with one hand on the keyboard. (that's so insulting) I did what you did once, and changed the password on the computer, only to be woken abruptly from my sleep at 1 am in the morning to be confronted by a raging irrational demon, breathing fire and shouting obsenities at me. I signed up to 'webwatcher' and installed it on her computer to see what was really taking place online. I was shocked by what was going on and with some of the text chats she was having, and considered blocking the IP address but thought that after 12 years of marriage, she was old enough to be sensible about the amount of time she was spending with the game. As I always say, "Everything is ok, in moderation" Where are we now? Filing for divorce after 14 years marriage, I've got too much going in the real world but each to their own, if she wants to play the game thats up to her. When she finally "wakes up" to the realise her life has just drifted by, I won't be there anymore, neither will her son. I hope you manage to resolve your issues, S

[wifey97]

I was searching things to help me cope as well. As I type husband is playing WOW...it is 11:58pm and he will probably be on for a few more hours. We have been married for almost 14 years. Before WOW he was never 'addicted' to anything. He like playing some computer games, but NEVER to this extent. The last post might just be the thing with my husband. He hates his job, and he probably doesn't have the control that he would like at work. I've complained to him already and have done the threats, and I've acted out of them too. When I say it's me or the game. He says "it's going to be like that is it?" I say things also like " your cheating on me with your game"; I've even said hope that WOW will give you great sex because you don't seem to care about me. He says things like you know it's always you. But I say put your money where your mouth is. Ultamately, that fades back to the same old grind. He excuses himself with : I work all day- I don't take time off; I go to college ( only recently), but when he comes home it's right to the computer. I ALWAYS fall asleep by myself and I don't understand why he think this is ok.
He goes a little crazy when he can't get on. His account has been raided and he said he was done with it, but then *(^*&%(* they restored his account and he was back on ! I've thought about cancelling account, but why should I be the bad guy in this? Perhaps there is nothing out there that I can do- but it sure is good to know I am not alone..... ( because I am right now!!!)