[caterpillar79]

Hey, Passion, I understand how you feel. But unlike you, I was once at the other side of the fence, but my case was a little different, for he lied to me about being married to the "wife". When I learned that they are bound through 'common law' (still honored in this State), I backed off and told the wife to take him back and make sure he won't stray again. It was a painful letting go episode. But it was meant to be, and I am proud of myself for doing so. Now, I am happier than before.

As a wife (and an ex-wife), I also share the same sentiment. I was married and was abused, forced to having sex and often I don't lubricate, I bled inside-out. Estranged husband was hooked unto another co-worker back then, so I found myself emotionally disconnected from him, until I just shut him down of my system. I have filed for divorce, but he wouldn't sign it. I am in limbo right now. He doesn't want me to re-marry and live a better life.

As for you, look at your situation as an UPGRADE. Transition or change is frightening and painful. But it gets better each day. Remember that before you can go UP, you must reach the bottom. Keep your spirit up. Pamper yourself.

[WildChild]

You know Cat, the law has some provision for this situation, do some research. A lot of attorneys will do a 30 to 60 min consultation for free, sort of an interview. Prepare your questions and see what you can learn. You may have to hire one so this will also help you see who you might want to work with but you may be able to pretty much do it yourself. THe courts should have all the docs on line on their web site.

[caterpillar79]

Yes, I will get back with my lawyer nextweek. I am free, I know, but the fact that my papers are not in place yet, drags me down into spiraling depression, knowing that my BF is bothered by it.