[Passion]

Its been seven months since my husband left me and moved in with another girl. When he left me he did not mention another girl but I soon found out. He told me that I was bringing him down in his art career and that he was tired of dragging me along. I never saw this as I was the one whom had sacrificed with him by being the sole providor as he went to welding school while he created some of his sculptures. When we decided to sacrifice. He told me it was for us, for our future. Well Seven months later, he is with someone else another artist whom intervened when she knew he was a married man. He is being successful in his art career, living with her, and now he has an art studio with her, and a shop and business. Everything he said he wanted for us. He has it but with her. Its devestating to me and now I feel like he was right that I was only dragging him down because with me he did not climb that ladder as quickly. I don't wish him any bad but its heartbreaking that he does not acknowledge my sacrifice for his vision a vision which he said was for us and our future. His life seems to be going like he has planned while I am left alone, in so much pain, and trying to just survive. I guess this time things are greener on the other side.

[Guest]

well what did YOU want for your future? seems to me you went along with whatever he wanted. congrats,you are free to do what you want now,and he has moved on to use somebody else. how is it because of you he did not climb the ladder quickly? what a crock of dung. if he had enough talent nad ambition he could go as far as he wanted HIMSELF despite who was sharing his bed. sounds like he needs to take more credit for his own success/failure and stop blaming others.

[Passion]

I wanted a happy family a husband whom loved me, children, a home. My career I worked hard and did it on my own. I had what I wanted until he decided that I was not what he wanted anymore. I still want the same thing....

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Passion....

He would not have got where he is today if it wasn't for your sacrifices and finances.

He made the comments that he did, for his own selfish reasons, of being able to walk away not feeling guilty, hiding his guilt.

He knows full well of your sacrifices, but he was selfish, he met someone whom shared the exact same passion and as such (passions are exactly that) consumed, he has consumed his time now with her only because of that passion..

Your passions were many not one, they were career, husband, family, household, the whole dice. He had one vision only (ART)...

He wasn't the right one for you...

Find someone whom is "equal" with you next time and shares with you with all you do..

Do not feel like a failure because you weren't or else he would not be able to open shop would he, he would have been a failure..

My ex is the same, he "used" his injury as an excuse for years and I did all the work and together we bought a Commercial Building and today I pay for it.

He has gone on to be successful as a teacher in Construction, and the likes and owns half a building.

All I can do is take positives. Such as for me, I own half a building that I wouldn't have without his house as calatoral.. I found this site and have been able to be there for others, I found a perfect guy who shares all that I do, in mind, body and spirit, I now own a car that I always dreamed of that otherwise, I wouldn't have ever financed as (mine lived in the driveway for 7 and a half years before).

Take the positives.

What are you NOW going to do with YOUR LIFE that you didn't do before and what have you got now that you otherwise wouldn't have had you not been with him, if there is nothing in that regard, it will be what you WILL GET.. Including a real great guy next time.

You won't see the light and happiness of what awaits you until you realise that it does.

CW

[Joy]

Some days are hard Passion...... You know he has called and he has tried to lean on you since the separation. You feel like you lost but maybe once you get over the shock and pain you will create exactly what you want and it will be your Passion not just focusing on his Passion in life.

[HALFNOTHING]

lol.. that what we feel when we are still holding on to something.. all relationships are much sweatier and full of passion if the first time.. thats why when we are in, we are thinking that there will be no end.. Try to let it go and go with in your life, you will blame yourself why did you do exactly what you are doing now..

now, if you are thinking that you love him and ready to accept him.. think twice, there will be an option for you.. giving second chances is giving the person a second chances to hurt us again.. that's the idea.. I was in desperate kind of life like what you have now.. to the extend that i nearly killed myself and begged him to be back at me.. yes, he did but he also did what exactly he did.. giving second chances is not an assurance that he won't do it again ever.. so, think a million times...

now, i have a fully happy marriage though we are hiding but still it's happy.. I never thought that i can find a man like this.. i used to a man heater because of my ex but now, im really happy..

hope you can get the point..

[WildChild]

Hi Passion,
Joy is right some days are just rougher than others. CW is right too you Know he wouldn't be able to do all this with her, by himself or with anyone else if you hadn't seen him through all those early years. It hurts to have given so much and have it disregarded. But now you have to take all your goodness and intelligence and skills and talent and start using them for your self!

What he does now no longer concerns you, what things look like on the outside aren't alway what they are on the inside. He used you, who's to say she isn't using him? It's not your concern, not now. Is he still calling asking you for info or help? Just remember, you supported both of you for a long time - so you can support just you, no problem. What are you interested in? Find a new hobby, develop a new skill. THings will start to look brighter.

[Passion]

I hope they do start to look brighter. Somehow I feel like I am stuck in a rut and I can't seem to find my way out. I used to love black and white photography and at some point I would consume myself with it. I have some Ideas of what I would like to do now I would like to try color photography. I guess I have to find myself again. I've been trying but it ends up that I am being the same person I was when in the relationship. I know I need to try harder because somehow I feel like I always end up giving up. Lately I feel like im in a place that I dont want to be in. I can't find my place. I am going to have a positive outlook things will turn out to be better than before. I know it will.

[WildChild]

Take it a day at a time but do plan some things to look forward to. Is there someplace you'd love to photograph?

[renee69]

I know how you feel.........im married and my husband and have been separated for 2 years now and it still hurt at times! You are definately free to do what you want now.....focus on you....thats whats important now..........