Wife cheating on me, why?

**Hopeless Dork** · 03-27-2010, 07:00 AM

What makes you think she is having an affair? You said you haven't seen it with your own eyes... it doesn't sound like she told you she is having one --- what are the things that make you think she is cheating?

**Hopeless Dork** · 03-27-2010, 07:09 AM

And to answer your other question, women cheat for as diverse reasons as men do.

Some of them being:

*Revenge: Knowing or even THINKING their significant other is having an affair can lead some women into another mans arms just to make a point that they can do it too. Or to try to feel better about what he's done.

*Lonliness: Whether the significant is physically distant (miles away) or emotionally distant (even sleeping in same bed) lonliness can push women, just like some men... into cheating

*To feel attractive: If a woman feels her guy doesn't pay her attention, and maybe even notices him paying attention to other women... she may flirt and then even cross the line with another man in order to feel that at least someone, if not their mate, finds them sexy.

*Sex: Yep, women cheat for that too... either not getting enough , or not getting the kind of sex they want, being with a selfish lover etc...

Those are just a few reasons some of my friends have cheated but there as many 'reasons' to cheat as their are people willing to do it.

There are plenty of women that would never cheat. Even if their husband did. Even if he made her feel unnatractive, even if he was distant. Its just not in their nature to do so.

And there are plenty of women that would cheat even if their man was mr. awesome and did everything under the sun to make her feel special.

**MissMeSha810** · 03-27-2010, 08:24 AM

Did you mean , "If I HADN'T seen it with my own eyes, I wouldn't believe she was cheating?" Meaning you saw her?

**rcoreyus** · 03-27-2010, 08:24 AM

Has she hinted at anything she thinks is missing in her life?

It may be as simple as physical attraction, or much more complex. (doesn't excuse it in any case - but its important to know the reason).

Maybe - you could ask - let her know that you know, don't be hostile, just try to find out why. Then you can decide what you want to do about it.

**Guest** · 03-28-2010, 08:04 AM

I think there are a lot of reasons women seek comfort from others when they are with another. However this being said, if you are certain she is cheating on you the best thing would be confronting her. Tell her that you love her and that you are willing to go to any lengths to make this relationship work. I would also suggest counseling for the two of you. Maybe, and I am not saying there is, but maybe there are underlying factors that she needs to work out and couples therapy would be great. Remember that when you do talk to her about this she may get defensive and yell and be angry with you, but be strong. If you are willing to stay with her, forgive her in your heart, mind and soul, than time counseling and love will help you. It is hard and hurtful for you I know, but maybe there is something (that may not have to do with you) that hurts inside of her too and this is her only way of expressing it. I hope you two get the professional help your relationship needs, and I hope you find love and acceptance in whatever path your life leads you in.

**stressed** · 03-28-2010, 03:44 PM

You saw your wife with another man but instead of anger you feel guilt. I find this very sad.

Maybe she was missing something she never told you about, or thought she did but you didn't hear it. If you talk to her in the same manner you posted your message I think she will tell you why (if it is true, and if she won't deny it).

Why women cheat?

- Revenge (their men have either also cheated in the past, or they have done something they will never forgive).

- To boost their self confidence (they feel neglected and unwanted, so when another man pays attention to them they easily fall for it).

- They are not sexually satisfied by their partner and seek other options.

- Boredom/because they have the opportunity to do so/don't expect their SO to find out/it's exciting. Many people cheat just because they have too much free time in their hands. In that case cheating becomes their hobby.

- They want to leave the current relationship and think it's easier to do so by starting a new one.

**KMonte85** · 03-29-2010, 04:39 AM

I don't think you are going to find you answer here, QinaX. Women (and men) cheat for a number of reasons, many listed here, and many more that weren't listed. Every instance of cheating is unique to that person and the situation.

Unfortunately, we can't tell you why your wife decided to cheat on you. You need to talk with her, find out what would cause her to do something like that. Perhaps it is something missing in the relationship that you're not aware of. Perhaps, she just wanted to, just because. We don't know, you don't know, but she does. And so, as painful as it will probably be, you need to have that conversation with her.

**Melvin John** · 03-30-2010, 07:56 PM

I'm also a guy and I think that there is an underline reason why your wife cheated on you but it may not have anything to do with you. So people just want to cake too.
You need to decide what your going to do with the cheating information you have. At this point you have to do what is best for you. Seriously!
Can you move forward with therapy or will the cheating continue or is it best if it's over.

**WildChild** · 03-30-2010, 08:00 PM

She is the only one who can answer this.

Wife cheating on me, why?

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