[stressed]

I agree with CW, I also have the feeling that he feels like you do, that he'd say the same words you say if we asked him. It doesn't seem to be a specific problem with either of you as individuals but more of having difficulties dealing with the new life you have and failing to find some time for each other as a couple. Do try to make this trip work, it will help you both so much.

[mel_non_stop]

Hi Chandlers Wish, Thank you for your advice. Yes we are sort of a young couple, im 28 he's 27. I really think we need more time together too. See, before we met I was a single mum doing it tough and he was a single bloke living it up, he's finding it hard to adjust but how long will it take him to adjust? Or is he just using that as an excuse. Our daughter is now 13 months old and we have been together for a few years. We have discussed him changing to day shift but he will lose $200 in his pay per week, and we need the money, also he has been doing night shift for a long time and is used to it, it would take him a long time for his body clock to adjust to working during the day. Im stuck in this position and I cope with it as well as I can but his arrogance and selfishness and nastiness that protrudes from him is killing us and is making my life a misery. We spent a long weekend together last weekend and it ended in an ugly agrument over our daughter, during the discussion He didnt understand me correctly as I said something that just came out wrong and then he deliberately said hurtful things to me, just adding fuel to the fire so we got into a very heated argument. We sorted out the miscommunication in the end and we apologised but then im still hurting from the horrible things he says to me. What will he say to me next time we argue? Now i feel so detached from our relationship and I dont want to feel that way, and he doesnt want to make me feel that way. how do i get him to stop? Why can he just be reasonable and grow up? He's like a little kid....

[sourpuss]

I don't know, a guy who does the laundry, helps with the kid on days off, and on top of it buys you expensive gifts....doesn't sound like he's selfish and doesn't care at all. Sounds like two people who are strapped for time and don't know how to communicate with one another.

What do you do for him that's romantic that you'd like him to reciprocate?