[simplyshonda]

Hi

I'm Maria, 27, been married to my husband for a little less than 3 years and have a two year old daughter.

Three days ago I came home from work a few hours earlier than usual, and when I came back I saw my younger sisters car in our parking. When I entered the house I saw my sister & husbands cloth on the floor and as well heard their weird voices from the bedroom. I left and came back a few hours later and they both were gone and everything was just the way I left the house back in the morning.

I just dont know how this could happen. I could imagine my husband cheating on me (as everyone could), but with my own SISTER? That's just unbelievable. I can't understand how my sister could do such a thing to me.

Im completely confused. I'm angry at both of them. I dont know what to do, I dont know for how long they've been doing that, or even is my husband sleeping with anyone else as well? should I tell them that I know about their thing? I just cant forget it even for a second. please I need some advice.

I have a twin brother, and we're very close & he always helped me with everything. I haven't told him anything yet, do you thing it's a wise thing to tell him?

Please, need some advice.
Thanks in advance
(sorry for bad English, I'm not a native)

*****Hello Maria, I can't say I know exactly what your going through, but my husband of 4 years(this month, August 2011), is in LOVE WITH MY LITTLE SISTER. I was informed the other day that he loves me but he is in love with her too. I am 23 and my little sister is 18. When my husband and I met in December of 2006, I never would have doubted that I would be in this position. I love my husband, but this is only one of many times he has hurt me, lied to me, and used me. And the sad part is my sister and I are just alike!!! Only difference is she weighs 100 pounds less than me. I have had nothing but every since I found out. Me and my sister are very close. And we stick by each other. In return of me finding out my husbands dark secret, my sister and I are having trouble continuing our relationship. And my sister HAS NO INTEREST IN MY HUSBAND. SHE HATES HIM. Thats why it doesn't bother me too much from her end. But the man I dedicated the last 5 years of my life to, just expects me too suck it up and keep going. Im sorry but you have to know my husband. Other than me, no one else in my family wants anything to do with him. All I know is that the whole situation is ed up. I don't know what to do anymore. And like I said before, this is not the first time he has dropped "a bomb" on me like this. He has lied to me for 4 years, hes cheated, manipulated and used. I just can't bring myself to leave him. I think it is because we share an almost 4 yr old son together. That is the only reason I stay with him. But I have been to the dr. lots of times for anti-depressants, crazy meds, and nerve medication. He has just about drove me crazy and I just do not know what to do anymore. He has gave me 1 of 2 options, to stay with him and ruin my relationship with my sister, or leave him to save what little of a relationship I have left with my sister. By the way just so that all you know, my sister was 14 when my husband said he started having feelings for her. I need some advice. Any and all is welcome.
Hope you all have a Blessed Day!!!!
SimplyShonda

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I've moved your post to your own thread and will be closing the one you posted on as the OP never returned un-fortunatley..

CW

[jns]

*****Hello Maria, I can't say I know exactly what your going through, but my husband of 4 years(this month, August 2011), is in LOVE WITH MY LITTLE SISTER. I was informed the other day that he loves me but he is in love with her too. I am 23 and my little sister is 18. When my husband and I met in December of 2006, I never would have doubted that I would be in this position. I love my husband, but this is only one of many times he has hurt me, lied to me, and used me. And the sad part is my sister and I are just alike!!! Only difference is she weighs 100 pounds less than me. I have had nothing but every since I found out. Me and my sister are very close. And we stick by each other. In return of me finding out my husbands dark secret, my sister and I are having trouble continuing our relationship. And my sister HAS NO INTEREST IN MY HUSBAND. SHE HATES HIM. Thats why it doesn't bother me too much from her end. But the man I dedicated the last 5 years of my life to, just expects me too suck it up and keep going. Im sorry but you have to know my husband. Other than me, no one else in my family wants anything to do with him. All I know is that the whole situation is ed up. I don't know what to do anymore. And like I said before, this is not the first time he has dropped "a bomb" on me like this. He has lied to me for 4 years, hes cheated, manipulated and used. I just can't bring myself to leave him. I think it is because we share an almost 4 yr old son together. That is the only reason I stay with him. But I have been to the dr. lots of times for anti-depressants, crazy meds, and nerve medication. He has just about drove me crazy and I just do not know what to do anymore. He has gave me 1 of 2 options, to stay with him and ruin my relationship with my sister, or leave him to save what little of a relationship I have left with my sister. By the way just so that all you know, my sister was 14 when my husband said he started having feelings for her. I need some advice. Any and all is welcome.
Hope you all have a Blessed Day!!!!
SimplyShonda

It is unlikely your husband is going to change in any significant way. Guys usually don't. So staying with him will just prolong the agony and continue damaging the relationship you have with your sister. I'm sorry that you have a child together that you don't want to hurt, but is this situation good for him to see? Figure out what is best for you and your child and go in that direction.

[Elanor-Jane]

You need to leave. If your family don't like him go to them for support and maybe hearing a few blunt truths from them will get u angry enough to stay away. Please don't stay, your child will be better off if he is raised around people that arnt constantly hurting each other and expecting compliance with unhealthy situations.

[ska1331]

I'm usually one for saying find a way to work it out, but in this situation....well he is just a schmuck. You always have choices in life and don't ever let anyone tell you different. Of course that doesn't meant that the opions we have are always easy ones. If the situation is unhealth for you, its probably unheathly for your son. In my opinion it would be best to get out before it gets worse and from the sound of it, you would probably have the support of your family too. You deserve far better than what he's giving and you are strong enough to go out and get it.