[DreamP346]

It is important to distinguish the behavior from the relationship. Wearing women's clothing in itself is not weird. Having relationship issues is also not weird. The sexual fetish negatively impacting the relationship is what is at issue here. I agree with both JennieBottle and CW. You are both looking at different aspects of this situation. A lot of communication and understanding from both parties is required to have a healthy relationship.

[jns]

He sounds controlling.

[Blondie1989]

This was extremely useful, thank you.
I had a discussion with him yesterday and he now understands that it's something I need to get used to before I can fully embrace it. And now we've had a very lengthy discussion about it, I feel more comfortable, we have set boundaries, like once a week we will have sex while he is wearing my underwear, but heir is not limited to that, if I suggest it then we will do it more than that. Since having that discussion we have had sex twice with him wearing my underwear. I think that, because I hate losing control, I feel more comfortable if it's me suggesting it, and through that, I don't feel inadequate because it's not him wanting to do it as a way of making sex better for him. We are easing into it for now, just wearing my underwear, but we have discussed taking it further, but when I feel more comfortable with it. Having the discussion with him has made us a lot closer as well and we are both a lot happier.
It isn't that I'm not open to trying new things, It was just completely out of the blue as he had hidden it from me completely for the first year of our relationship. If he can accept me for who I am then I should be able to accept him for who he is. I don't think I could find anyone else who would put up with my quirks!
Also, I find that due to him being in touch with his feminine side makes him the most caring, loving, generous and devoted men I have ever been with and I could never imagine being with anybody else.

Thank you for your advice, it helped a lot, and has helped us resolve this very quickly

[brunettebabe]

I agree with buddhaboy and the whole transvestite thing. It sounds like it goes way past a fetish especially if he wants to paint his nails and put on tanning cream.

[ItalianSweetie]

Hi I find this totally odd and disgusting thats just my opinion. How can any straight man want to wear ladies panties, wear sunless tanner, and paint his nails? He is also making you feel very uncomfortable, and forcing you to accept his behavior, and you should'nt have to. I would never put up with this. And my husband definately wouldn't be wearing my panties, thats for sure.....

[Harmony]

Hi I find this totally odd and disgusting thats just my opinion. How can any straight man want to wear ladies panties, wear sunless tanner, and paint his nails? He is also making you feel very uncomfortable, and forcing you to accept his behavior, and you should'nt have to. I would never put up with this. And my husband definately wouldn't be wearing my panties, thats for sure.....

I do respect your opinion, and you're entitled to it. Though this is how I see it...

Just like most gay men didn't ask to be born gay, this guy most likely didn't ask to have this fetish and given the choice would likely trade it for one more socially acceptable. Unfortunately for him being able to simply ignore and disregard, or exchange the fetish which nearly cost him his relationship isn't on his list of options.

If dressing up as a woman, deriving sexual pleasure from wearing a woman's underwear or even fantasizing about being a woman while he's wearing a woman's underwear and making love to a woman brings him satisfaction—and this idiosyncrasy is gradually gaining acceptance from his partner—I don't see the big deal.

He likely kept it a secret for so long (I'll bet the secrecy aspect of this is what upset the OP the most) because he was afraid his partner would react the way you just have. There are people out there who murder and rape for fun, that's odd and disgusting. A man who likes dressing up as a woman (especially in the privacy of his own home) isn't really that big of a deal in my opinion.

[curiouslady269]

My husnand recently told me about his desire to wear pantyhose. He does during sex with me, but not all the time. I even wear them with him.

I don't think it is right if he is forcing it onto you, but, it does seem like you are being a bit hostile against something harmless. You should appreciate that he is trusting enough in you to share his fetish. He could indulge it with someone else. If you continue to fight him, he may decide that you are not the one for him. Like someone else stated above, who is he hurting? If you are not comfortable with it, then maybe you should end the relationship. It is up to you which one is more important.