[FionaDiaz]

My husband did the same thing... until he saw the ultra-sound, then it was "we can't get that much food, we have to save up for the baby!" Except he was giving his money away to his mother and his mistress.... long story.

My husband and I now have three accounts. One is a joint account only for bills, one is mine and my daughter's (that he doesn't know about) and one is his. We depost all money into the joint account and after the bills are paid, I save 10% and then distribute the extra money evenly into the other accounts. That way we both have some "fun" money.

I think, even if you are saving money, you and your husband should each have an "allowance". It's important to have fun, but your husband has to understand how much a baby actually costs.

Why don't you look online about the prices of formula, diapers, wipes, ect. things you will need to buy every month and show that to him, and then show him the list of things you need to buy for the baby, such as a crib, a high chair and baby clothes. Maybe if he sees these things he will understand why you get so worried about money.

Best of luck.

[FionaDiaz]

Obviously some peope take it too far, in fact I know a few guys who can't help but spend money on totally useless , like some wheels for a skateboard he hasn't ridden in six months, or buying DVDs when they could just as well download or rent them etc.

You mean like a new trigger for a new paintball gun?

[PJamieO]

EXACTLY!!! And yes, he has NO IDEA how much a baby is gonna cost. Not to mention he hopes there is twins in there so we will be done having kids. (2 is limit for me!!) Do you think its a good time to choke him now????

[rcoreyus]

Uneeklyme: Drifting a bit off topic here, but there is a potential problem with keeping separate accounts. Some friends of mine were doing that – then he made a mint on stocks. Now she works full time, he just lives on his earnings. It is fair in the sense that it is exactly what they had agreed to, and he did work very hard for his money, but as the years go by, it “feels” unfair – it is easy to forget his work of 5-10 (and eventually more) years ago, and just see her working her tail off, and him just having fun.

I do agree that deciding what is fun and what isn’t can be really tough.

PjamieO: I completely agree that raising a child comes first. You might want to sit down and do a budget. Figure out how much fun money you can spend. You can change the budget as you learn more.

[sourpuss]

EXACTLY!!! And yes, he has NO IDEA how much a baby is gonna cost. Not to mention he hopes there is twins in there so we will be done having kids. (2 is limit for me!!) Do you think its a good time to choke him now????

Does he even want to have kids? Not to be rude but that last comment you made made me think that he conceded and now he sees it as you got you baby you wanted and now he's going to get his toys that he wants. I could be way off base, just a thought.

[patricias213]

haha I know ...I definantly think to myself it could be worse.... but come on!! The paintball trigger thing is just a small complaint. He also wants a new car, snowmobile, 4 wheeler, canoe, jet ski, dirt bike....blah blah blah blah blah!!! I could go on and on here! I said no way. We have a house we just built last August, we put a fence up, a deck, electric fence (dogs kept digging under wooden fence) a brand new shed, and he just laid sod. Last thing I bought for myself was curtains for our bedroom. Life is great!

Sounds just like my hubby...these are also the things he like, right now the wall on our hallway is full if bibi guns, swords, pilet guns, different styles of knifes ...all for decoration, i keep telling him our guest will be scared to visit us again lmao!

[ChelseaRenee]

Uneeklyme: Drifting a bit off topic here, but there is a potential problem with keeping separate accounts. Some friends of mine were doing that – then he made a mint on stocks. Now she works full time, he just lives on his earnings. It is fair in the sense that it is exactly what they had agreed to, and he did work very hard for his money, but as the years go by, it “feels” unfair – it is easy to forget his work of 5-10 (and eventually more) years ago, and just see her working her tail off, and him just having fun.

I do agree that deciding what is fun and what isn’t can be really tough.

PjamieO: I completely agree that raising a child comes first. You might want to sit down and do a budget. Figure out how much fun money you can spend. You can change the budget as you learn more.

Wow...I wouldn't care if I had been working my butt off 30 years straight before I hit it big, there's not way I'd sit back and watch my husband work himself to death while I messed around all day. Talk about just BEGGING for resentment in a relationship...Besides, if they get divorced she'll get half anyway, might as well share the wealth now before she wises up and runs off with it.

[commonsense]

Yeah, like any woman is ever going to have access to my bank account ....

Even if I ever get married, which I doubt, it'll be separate accounts for me...


But what I meant to say by that is, that women often don't have hobbies (their hobby is spending money), wheras men have interests to keep themselves occupied, and women need to understand that we NEED that. We need to have our own interests and stuff, otherwise we become hateful zombies.

Obviously some peope take it too far, in fact I know a few guys who can't help but spend money on totally useless , like some wheels for a skateboard he hasn't ridden in six months, or buying DVDs when they could just as well download or rent them etc.

Isn't there a site somewhere where all "women haters" talk to each other?
Have you even tried to find it? I'm just saying....

[anonymouswhitefemale]

What? You mean this isn't it? Oooh, I must've typed "man haters" instead of women haters and wound up here, my bad.

The fact that I wouldn't get married or share a bank account means that I don't trust people, not women. And you can't deny that a lot of men will spend some money on something that is a hobby of theirs, and a woman might buy a dress that she wears for one night then it goes in the wardrobe with the rest, so we all waste our money our own ways.

You just have to not be too pragmatic about it, life is for the living, not for the budgeting at the expense of fun.

[moonshadow48]

Maybe he is afraid that once the baby is born he won't have the money for HIS toys any more so he is going to get as many as he can now!!!