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Sex Surge

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  • Sex Surge

    Helllllllllllpppp!!! I am in my 50's very happily married and going through a major sex surge!!!! My insides ache!! I want and think about it all the time!!! with my hubby AND others!! I want to have an affair to fulfill my fantasies!!! I am driving myself crazzzzzzzzzzeee.

  • Welcome, Lucy!

    Did you have a high sex drive before and it has just gotten higher? Was it a sudden change? Any idea what brought it on?
    "Those sowing seed with tears
    Will reap with a joyful shout." - Psalm 126

    Comment


    • Hi Lucy!! Sounds a hormonal surge. I'm assuming you have not yet started menopause?

      As long as you're feeling great otherwise, just enjoy the surge while it lasts. But enjoy it with your hubby or through masturbation. Don't ruin your marriage over it.
      "Be what you're looking for."

      Comment


      • Have you talked to your husband about it? Looked at how to spice things up? There's a lot to do without actually having an affair.
        Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose - Kris Kristofferson and Fred Foster (sung by Janis Joplin)

        Comment


        • I agree it's probably a hormonal change. have you seen your doctor about it?<br />
          <br />
          If bringing new people into the marriage isnt accepted by your husband, I hope that you will discuss the issue in detail with him and make a way to satisfy yourself without ruining your marriage. <br />
          <br />
          This likely will pass. Assuming your marriage is good and you want to stay married, don't make choices that you will regret once the hormones have leveled out.<br />
          <br />
          Talk to your doctor, talk to your husband.

          Comment


          • No I haven't talked to my doctor or husband about it. Too embarrassed. I thought too it could be hormonal as I haven't gone through this since my 30's (while going through a divorce). I have a wonderful marriage, so an affair is not an option.

            Comment


            • PS No menopause yet. I am 54, just recently no period for three months and then I got it for 4 days, so my body is changing

              Comment


              • So this is the second time the surge has happened? What do you think triggered it 20 years ago? The emotional upheaval from the divorce? Was it the same as now?

                I'm wishing what you have was contagious or at least reproducible? I don't see why you feel embarrassed about it.
                "Those sowing seed with tears
                Will reap with a joyful shout." - Psalm 126

                Comment


                • 20 yrs old I had a reg partner. More sex back then. No it is definitely different now. More so. I do have non-cancer fibroids in my ovaries.

                  Comment


                  • Talk to hubby. Maybe he would be delighted to accommodate your new desires and energy.
                    "Be what you're looking for."

                    Comment


                    • Hi Lucy, According to me sex surge is a good thing but in the long term, it will ruin your married life if you indulge yourself with others for the sexual activity. the best idea is discuss with your husband and try out new ways of intimacy. Maybe that will help you.

                      Comment


                      • Perimenopause can actually increase your sex drive for a while, which is likely what you’re experiencing. For some women, however, the exact opposite is true. Some women have sex drives that dramatically decrease during that hormonal shift.

                        From what I’ve read, sometimes the drop in estrogen can lead to an increase in testosterone, at least in relative terms – not that your body is making more testosterone all of a sudden, but there is more of it in comparison to estrogen, if that makes sense. So that could be what is amping up your sex drive.

                        You might as well ride that wave for as long as it lasts and enjoy it — with your husband or alone (or both).

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by Alison H. View Post
                          Perimenopause can actually increase your sex drive for a while, which is likely what you’re experiencing. For some women, however, the exact opposite is true. Some women have sex drives that dramatically decrease during that hormonal shift.

                          From what I’ve read, sometimes the drop in estrogen can lead to an increase in testosterone, at least in relative terms – not that your body is making more testosterone all of a sudden, but there is more of it in comparison to estrogen, if that makes sense. So that could be what is amping up your sex drive.

                          You might as well ride that wave for as long as it lasts and enjoy it — with your husband or alone (or both).
                          Aromatase (use a search engine on aromatase) can convert testosterone to estrogen so the two are tied together. Maybe perimenopause interferes with the production of aromatase in some cases and so the testosterone doesn't get converted to the degree that it was before.
                          I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
                          ...
                          Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

                          From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

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