[ChelseaRenee]

Seconding Hystorm. He needs to cut it out. If he's jerking off so much that being with a flesh and blood girl doesn't get him off, he's playing with himself too much. Seriously..gah. Kinda pathetic.

[Guest]

hmmm.
i think most are right, he is used to his own pleasure and needs to stop. especially if your dating. if he cant wait untill you two are ready to go again a differnt day, he is being selfish.
oh it is good to get off everyday, but nothing beats the real thing from the women to do whats needed to get the job done, if you catch my drift.
if its having to deal with sex itself and not just a hand/blow-job, then try different things, possitions, etc. i know certain possitions will make me take a longer time than others. example: if i am on top or doing more of the action, then i take less time, if she is on top and doing more work than me, well it takes me longer......... so possibly let him do more work. thats 1 reason why i like the woman on top besides i can now use my hands and do more things in general...
oh , TMI revealed, but hopefully it will help you in some way.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

okayy, so this is the cituation.

my boyfriend masturbates alot! like when we have sex, he will have to masturbate to cum.
idk, if i just am bad in bed, or what? i hate it! really. so recently i decided to give him head, to maybe see if the same thing would happen, && YESS it did!

i can't seem to make him cum! i've had previous partners and they came, why can't i make him! i was thinking i should try different things to help explore. i'm scared to ask him, cause we really don't talk about previous partners! i need advice from people who have seen && done it all!

hellppppp!

Look if he masterbates a lot, that is not a different story to " when you have sex he has to masturbate to cum" ... based on your reply.

People are saying basically that " it is all that he knows" maserbate, cum, with or without a woman, they are asking how old is he?

The other thing is you talk about "other partners" but you will not discuss that with him... Could he be worried ? That they were "better" and therefore has the problem of performance?

You really need to reply to your thread with questions if you want answers, because people are seriously jumping at straws to answer your question.


CW

[Lrgjake3]

It is called giving head because it was "street" lingo to call it giving brain before that. Its called that because well known guys think with it lol. So it turned into giving head because obviously where the brain is located. COOL FACT lol

[HeyItsMe]

If you really, really turn him on without any sex nor oral, then he'll be ready to blow up =) The key is there. Sometimes I had sex for 2 or 3 hours and... well It's okay, but that's because we didn't have much of the foreplay. Sometimes, the foreplay is so good it's better than sex =P then sex lasts like for 30 minutes xD.

Anyway, after a good foreplay, try positions that make him finish faster (like the missionary - that's the worst position for short lasting people), or that he may really like, and take control over it, not letting him "rest" (in my case would be doggy =P my friends also told me it's a great position for them, find out if ur guy is the same!)

It's all on the foreplay, in the end =P. Bye!

[Tuesday]

I think this is like what happened when a woman uses a vibrator too much....then....the only way she can get off is a certain way and other things don't work as well. This guy has become conditioned to coming in a certain way and it's like getting the record stuck, he can't have an orgasm a different way. I don't think you should take this personally at all, I don't think it has anything to do with any inadequacy on your part.

[HeyItsMe]

Very true also. He's gotten too used to finish this way. You have to change that - you can do it!.

My girl couldn't have an orgasm while having sex when we first started (she was a virgin before) since she... had a good trait with herself =P. After a few times she started to get used to THIS way to orgasm =P. Of course it's a transition, I'm guessing you'll have to do lot of manual work, if you get what I mean =P

Just like women we also have special spots! (also the G-spot, but that's not the case in here xD). The skin right under the top (specially the below side... I mean, if he'd be looking at it, it'd be the part he can't see =P but around the top), and the base of the penis are the primary ones. If you're doing it manually, make sure you go ALL the way up and down, to distribute the pleasure =P. Press your hand harder if you wanna ensure your efforts are for good

Bye! =)

[WildChild]

If you'd like one perspective on vibrator use check out the tantric site, whitelotuseast dot com under Vibrators. They put forward that vibrators should carry a warning that they are hazzardous to your love life because they do the job too well and may create a situation that reduces or shuts off a woman's ability to respond to her lover.

This is of course one view but lab studies done have confirmed that they do reduce responsiveness. My view is that they should be more of a limited use tool for helping a woman learn what an orgasm feels like or showing her that she can orgasm, since many woman don't really believe they can.

[Tuesday]

I agree with your perspective Wildchild I use my vibrator too much but I'm single and in need of some sort of comfort! I worry that when I have a relationship again I'll not be able to respond to my lover like I should.

[Heatwave]

Most men start masturbating as soon as they reach puberty, like 12 or 13, so by the time they are 18 or 19 they already have several years of practice. Believe it or not, it's an adjustment to get used to the stimulation of a real woman. It's like the penis needs to be "re-trained" to respond to a woman's mouth or vagina. It's not an automatic thing.

That's really interesting to hear, I've found exactly the same thing, as a woman it's been a journey to get used to the very different feeling of a man. Especially getting used to oral, I was like 'hey that's MY area'! Sorry, not to do with the thread it just struck a chord..