[Ross]

I have been having sex with my boyfriend for months now. We have anal, oral and regular...while anal sex killed me the first time its ok now. It pains me initial few minutes but then its fine. My prob is with regular sex...i dont know why but it always pains and i dont get any pleasure. Any suggestions??? My boyfriend wants me to enjoy regular sex ...and i dont

[Magnetism]

Answer these questions, if you don't mind.

1) Are you doing enough foreplay to get your vagina/clitoral area lubricated and aroused? Just b/c you're mentally horny doesn't mean that your body is ready to take in a penis. Your body has to feel aroused and tingly all over to signal that you're ready for sex. If your vagina isn't aroused, your muscles tighten up and rushing into sex will hurt.


2) Are you nervous or tense during the time of entry?

3) Are you using extra lubricant?


If the answer is no, I would suggest to try all of this. Relax, stimulate your clitoris/vagina for awhile, or add artificial lubricant.


If the answer is yes, try to get a check-up to the gyno just to make sure everything is okay (unknown infections can cause pain).



Or, it might just take time to get used to it if you just started having sex. Some girls report feeling pleasure after having sex 12-25 times. Start inserting smaller objects slowly (like a finger) in your vagina to get used to it, and to help you relax.


Good luck!

[Ross]

Yes,
I have recently started hvg sex, so maybe thats the issue. Also i feel mental pressure....i guess i need to relax. But for the other part such as using lubricant or foreplay...i dont see any problems here. I too feel that it will take me some more time to adjust to sex... I try to tell this to my bf...but he feels its weird

[Magnetism]

Don't feel bad. How often do you have sex?A few times a week? Every day? I heard that vaginal muscles tighten up when you're not having sex, contrary to the boys' myth of the vagina getting bigger and bigger with each penetration. It might just be a case of getting used to it, taking it slow and relaxing for you.

Your boyfriend should be able to understand, as nobody is born a sexpert. You guys are enjoying oral and anal together. There's no need to feel awkward about wanting to take vaginal sex slower.

[WildChild]

Think I will have to do some research on this painful sex stuff. There are a lot of posts about it. I've never experienced it, but seems to be common.

[Magnetism]

It just goes to show that every woman is different. I see it like how some women love giving oral sex, while others hate it. Some experience painful penetration while others are lucky to never experience it.

[WildChild]

But there must be reasons and way to alieviate it. A woman's body is made for it, shouldn't be a problem.

[Magnetism]

But there must be reasons and way to alieviate it. A woman's body is made for it, shouldn't be a problem.

It shouldn't be a problem if a woman likes the person or is lubricated/aroused enough. I do believe that the body is telling you that it's not ready to take in something yet, or they just don't want that person inside of you....(I was in abusive relationships, and the abuser hurt like .being inside of me........whereas a vibrator/dildo felt fine inside of me).

[robbin]

well i would just like to say that if its a burning kind of pain, especially since you just started to have sex, there is a good chance you could have bacterial vaginosis. it is SOMETIMES acompanied by and foul odor (usually but not always fishy) and posslbe redness and itching but it is NOT a yeast infection. i just found out that i have reoccuring BV. this is caused by my diet and the type of soap i was using along with the fact that i was using perfumed tampons. it can also occur or worsen if your man cums inside you. what happens is your pH levels change which causes a flux in your bacteria balance inside your uterus and vaginal canal. it is NOT becuase you are not clean and excessive cleaning can make it worse. i just learned all this thought i would share