[Saralaise]

My boyfriend and I have a great sex life; however, he seems to want to do it far more often than I want to. There have been some instances where we have done it upwards of 3 times a day; Not a bad thing, however I get "sexed out" and sometimes won't be in the mood for a while, whereas he is able to go again and again and again. I find that the more we do it in a short period of time, I get a little sore "down there" and it makes it a bit difficult for me to enjoy myself.

I know girls hit their sexual peak earlier than guys do, and I am one year older than my boyfriend; could this be the main cause of me getting "sexed out" after numerous daily romps in the bedroom?

Sometimes I feel that something isn't right with me, because I WANT to go again, but I physically can't do it. Any suggestions?

[Iseulda]

"girls hit their sexual peak earlier than guys do"? You think?

I always understood that men are at their sexual peak in their late teens and early twenties and that women are at their most sexual in their forties.

That aside, you don't say what ages you both are and a one year difference isn't going to be a big deal. People vary - heck, my guy is 18 years older than me and there are days he wears me out.

If his sexual appetite is greater than yours and it is causing you physical discomfort then you need to talk to him about that. If he is horny and you are sore then don't have sex just to humour him - if you want to help him get sated there are other things you can do that will allow cooch recuperation - handjob, oral, frotting. You can also stimulate yourself without penetration, or he can; a bullet vibe (small vibe mainly for clitoral stimulation), oral, etc..

The other thing you could do, sometimes, is ask him to be more gentle with you. I apologise if I have it wrong, but I'm assuming that the sex that leaves you sore is rather vigorous. I like vigorous sex, it's great - but if it is leaving you sore then, if he wants it again, he should consider being a little more gentle. Pick a position like spooning - lots of stimulation for him but not so deep for you, and the penetration will concentrate pressure in different areas inside you than positions like missionary or doggy.

I'm ignoring the obvious idea that you can say no and he can masturbate. You sound like you're happy with the level of intimacy and sexual contact - you just don't want the discomfort, or to be turned off sex by it (however short term that turn off is).

[Saralaise]

Its not that the sex is vigorous; its just so frequent at times, I guess my body doesn't have time to rest and then be able to get stimulated and wet again? does that make sense? I do plan on talking with him about it though. Thanks for your input.

[AlleyWay]

There is nothing wrong with you. Your body just needs time to get ready again. Instead of sex try new ways to get your partner to reach and orgasm. Whether it's a BJ, HandJob, etc. Try different ways so that all the focus isn't on your vagina.

[WildChild]

I think the much touted sexual peak is a combination of where you are in your life, stress levels, health, confidence and body comfort with hormones and where your head is. You can hit one any time or all the time. My own observation has been that when I've been happiest, I've been horniest. Age hasn't had anything to do with it. Times when I've lost interest, there has been high stress and/or an unhappy relationship. I'm over 50, am somewhere along in the process of menopause and as wet and horny I've ever been (which has been pretty darn horny - when I'm happy).

Everyone is different, Don't know how old you are but in my twenties, I would have regarded 3 times a day as pretty average, with 6 or 7 as doing good. You have to do what is comfortable for you. Are you aroused before sex? Or just doing what he wants? - nothing wrong with that once in a while but not consistantly. The idea of getting him off in other ways sometimes is a good one, it will spice things up a but and keep it fresher. You do need to mix it up a bit, sex shouldn't become obligatory or perfunctionary and just cause he gets an errection doesn't mean he has to use it, right now. Have you tried building some sexual tension and anticipation? When he says lets go, tell him to hold that thought (maybe literally) you'll want it later? Tell him what you want to do - later? Give yourself some time to get in the mood and really want it.

[feelmyfury]

I have the same problem- my man wants to keep going and going and after the first time or two- that's it for me! everyone's different and it's not a bad thing. plus if you both thought and felt the same about absolutely everything- maybe it wouldn't be so interesting. my man has learned that looking forward to it makes him want me so much more and it's worth it. but again- everyone's different and it has nothing to do with you not needing it anymore than him because of age. you're just unique

[crosewood]

if it hurts more than being pleasurable then, yes, it's too much. our muscles down there need some rest too. why not ask your guy to refrain a bit so the next one will be more intense? there are benefits to waiting

[Swiftus]

I am the total opposite. When I am done, it is hard for me to get hard again for a good 20 minutes and I still need help from my wife to get there.

[whit4488]

girl your lucky he can go again and again. i can only get my man to have sex with me like 3 times a month. but when he asks for me, tell him your sore. he shouldnt wanna push you after that

[Steph33]

My aunt told me bluntly "be a in the bedroom or somebody else will."

If he's horny, get him off. If you really don't want intercourse at that moment lots of other ways to take care of his want.

If you don't often, someone else eventually will.

Unless I'm throwing up sick from the flu or something like that, I've never not gotten my guy off when he was horny.

And same for him in return. If to tired for an erection, he gives me oral and plays with me in every ofter way.

I think that keeps us perfectly happy with who we have and no need or want for others. The only time either of us masturbates is in front of each other or doing it to each other.

A few minutes invested in oral sex for him or a hand job to release on your chest keeps him happy and avoids problems later you would rather not go through.