[Hopeless Dork]

I understand ohthereyouare's point of how losing weight will help, but disagree with why. Losing weight will help because like WC says it will make YOU feel sexy. To argue that theres half naked women around all the time and so that increases his odds or something is.. pure male fantasy. lol. Why are his odds any different with the variety of clothes the girls have on in the heat - any different than they are at any time of year.

And if he is walking around comparing , his love.. his, girl... the one who fullfills all his fantasies and has been there for him always to some girl in booty shorts and bikini top well then... she wouldn't be missing out.

There is always going to be someone hotter and with less clothes on than you (period). I have times where I leave my house feeling like the hottest thing walking, I've got on some sexy little outfit , leaving nothing to the imagination and I will see some girl out with even less, and even less, and even less... sure I can throw on a pair of pasties and wrap my vajayjay in dental floss to hit the local grocery store, but there will just be someone standing there naked anyway so who cares right?

You can't try to outbeat the competition, you can just be the best you can be. If a man is standing around trying to see what is the best he can get at any given time of the year he will be the one ending up on the short end of the stick. Because women... will never really have trouble going home with any guy she wants (sure maybe not a relationship... etc but really and truly a woman doesn't have to be lonely if she doesn't want to) and men, well... may not always be so lucky.

[thegoodstuffguy]

Zen, Most likely your weight is a bigger issue to you than it is to him.

I certainly KNOW this is the case with my wife. If she puts on weight it drives her crazy and she obseses about it, to me she's still sexy as ! The damaging part here is the self doubt and damage to your self esteem. Good on him for not making you feel worse, but you don't seem to need much help with the self esteem beat up!

Puttin on weight is not the end of the world, especially while studying. My wife did the same and it came off soon after the stress levels and went down and convenient "just got to get though the day" eating habbits disappeared.

One thing I will say is thatthere are far, far more important things to most guys than whether thier girl has put iona little weight. Most guys I know, myself included would much rather be with a girl who's put on a little weight, but is sexually experimental or adventurous, or just generally fun, than someone who has a great body but is miserable and self concious all the time.

Have a little fun, enjoy your sex life and perhaps try and step it up a little, push your boundaries, and possibly his, have a few truely wild nights and you're fears will vanish.

A good bottle of wine or two, can be a great start to a great night to break the ice and inhibitions down, and if his sex drive really is a problem, there are plenty of safe, fun, legal and freely available products that can put a rocket in his pocket in no time flat - they'll increase his sensation and staying power too so there's a real benefit for him here - and similar ones for yourself so you don't have to miss out either.

Wall off 24 hours (with some of the products out there you'll need all 24!), even better if you can get away somewhere but all you really need is privacy, put the books away - have a few drinks and/or other things and get those clothes off! One wild night and I guarantee you will feel more secure about your relationship - no man worth the man is going to leave a woman who is that much fun and can add that much excitment to his life.

Even just the mutual sharing of something like taking a herbal stimulant together can be a rebonding experience - kind of like sharing a dare or having an adventure together. It's something you do together, take a chance together, show each other you're willing to push the boundaries a little and can surprise each other.

Wow, this has turned into a bit of a novel, but the main things i want to get across are that weight is not as much of an issue as outlook and personality and the willingness to live life to the full. Ever looked around and seen an attractive guy with an unattractive girl? there's a good reason for that! Don't be down on yourself either - life's full of people who are more than willing to put the boot into you for no reason - the last thing you need is to do it for them!