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  • toto
    Junior Member
    • Sep 2009
    • 9

    suffering from vaginismus?

    i'm confused if the pain i'm feeling due inserting my finger or my husband thing is normal or not. the opening is so sensitive even from touching.

    i'm 21 yrs old.. Muslim so i'm having sex experience for the first time. i thought i would enjoy it.. but i couldn't let anything in more than 1 centimeter .. it hurts.

    i'm not suffering alone.. my husband does too.. he is considering, not trying to rush anything.. but i got tired.. enough to think of getting divorce.
    everything in our life is great. we love each other a lot. Sex is the first problem we face.
    So Am I suffering from vaginismus?
  • Guest

    How long has this been going on?

    Do you drink?

    Have a couple glasses of wine.

    Try again.

    Comment

    • toto
      Junior Member
      • Sep 2009
      • 9

      i can't drink. i'm not allowed. i'm muslim.
      it's my first time. i didn't try to insert anything b4.

      Comment

      • Guest

        Originally posted by toto
        i can't drink. i'm not allowed. i'm muslim.
        it's my first time. i didn't try to insert anything b4.
        Congrats to you for staying faithful to your beliefs.

        Do you have sexual feelings? Are you aware when you are aroused?

        Try to make some progress on your own time, when your husband is not around. It's your body - you know it best. Some things are best approached this way. Try exploring with your own fingers when you feel that you are aroused...this will make it easier and probably less painful. This is more mental than it is physical.

        Good luck.

        Comment

        • toto
          Junior Member
          • Sep 2009
          • 9

          Originally posted by OhThereYouAre
          Congrats to you for staying faithful to your beliefs.

          Do you have sexual feelings? Are you aware when you are aroused?

          Try to make some progress on your own time, when your husband is not around. It's your body - you know it best. Some things are best approached this way. Try exploring with your own fingers when you feel that you are aroused...this will make it easier and probably less painful. This is more mental than it is physical.

          Good luck.
          thanx = )

          i tried once b4 to touch it.. i didn't dare to insert my finger bcuz it hurts
          Is that normal with everybody? or not? shouid it be sensitive area in my first experience?
          i had sexual feelings but it all disappear whenever i try to insert anything.. sometime even when we are in bed
          so it is not normal?

          Comment

          • nightqueen
            Senior Member
            • Jan 2009
            • 139

            You need lubrication before you can just insert a finger, or penis. Get some KY and then try to insert a finger or two.

            Comment

            • toto
              Junior Member
              • Sep 2009
              • 9

              i've never tried to insert anything without it..

              Comment

              • nightqueen
                Senior Member
                • Jan 2009
                • 139

                Have you ever had a GYN exam?

                Comment

                • goodday2815
                  Junior Member
                  • Sep 2009
                  • 6

                  I was a virgin when I got married too. Don't worry. It took me 3 months to get my husbands penis fully inside. You have to have sex every day. My Husband and I were dating for 8 years before we got married. So there was so much love and i was mentally aroused when I am with him. WHen I tried I got really scared that i can never satisfy him and he is going to leave me. He was really calm and careful and we learnt together.
                  What we did was this. Try to be sexual every night. A lot of foreplay, kissing, watching porn together. masturbating each other. When you start to come together and hug and go to sleep you feel so much love for each other. Once you have done that for few days, you gain belief in your self that you can satisfy your man and you know he is happy with you. Now you try to have intercourse. Ask him to put only up for a inch first two days then do the normal thing and cum. Then, try some more the next day .. like that go for a couple of months. Trust me, before you know it, you will be a pro.

                  Comment

                  • toto
                    Junior Member
                    • Sep 2009
                    • 9

                    nightqueen : no i haven't

                    goodday2815: it's good to hear that، hope i'd be pro too = ) . that's what we are doing since our marriage.. yet i got worried. why we can't do it from the first time. i tried to just tolerate the pain and do it.. but there was sooo pain that let me start from the begining. my husband penis reached one time to get me to bled some drops.. afterward getting it in is more painful even 1 inch.. i think i'm afraid of the pain. but 2 or 3 months are a lot for me.. i can't just keep trying all that time..

                    i just discussed that with him.. i told him that i might have vaginismus so decide to visit a doctor once i'm done with my period.

                    Comment

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