[WildChild]

Interesting trivia # 457

Its can be unpleasantly painful to have sex with a woman who is the "perfect" 8% body fat type. Lots of bones and angles going-on. Give me rubenesque any day!

LOL. I'm certainly not Rubenesque but in younger days when I was more girly than womanly I did have a BF who complained that he could cut himself on my hip bones. We weren't weight obsessed then but didn't have so much junk and no video games or video to keep us laying around all the time.

[rcoreyus]

When you are on top, I'm sure he is enjoying the view and the experience, not worrying that your body isn't perfect.

[Hopeless Dork]

During sex I am very aware of my body and the angles that show me in the best light. If being on top makes u worry about ur tummy - wear a skirt - when you get down to biz hitch it over your hips upward instead of taking it off- then when you climb on top and take ur shirt off you won't feel as exposed with the skirt hiding ur tummy.

Wear a tube top and pull it down to expose ur breasts but keeping tummy covered.

Just a couple of ideas to give him a show while still feeling comfy with what he's seeing.

My tummy is flat but I have some stretch marks that make me feel insecure unless the lites are dim.

For lights on sober sex I cover the tummy so I can concentrate on feeling good and not obsessing on my stretch marks lol.

But on top is not my fave position- when I get up there to me its like foreplay- I like giving him a show and looking at his face - but to orgasm- him on top, behind me or beside me is what does it for me!

[Texinator]

Trust me, he won't care about stretch marks one bit. Probably not when you're naked in general, and certainly not when you're naked during sex.

[dolphinlefty]

Yeah. I know the feeling. But my boyfriend is amazing and helped me get over it. I now feel incredibly sexy when I'm on top. He always gives this particular smile that just makes me wanna do my thing for him. haha. Plus he's chubbier than me and rather hairy but I never notice anything except how cute he looks when we're having sex. haha. I think the more your guy reassures you, the easier it will get. Still sometimes I start trying to compose my face a particular way cause I remembering seeing porns where the girl looked dumb or weird cause she had a particular expression on. haha. The strangest things come to my mind when I'm having sex.

[AloneNtheCrowd]

My GF hates her tummy, but I absolutely love it! I think it's a general misconception that men(well at least mature men) need, expect or even want a woman to be the media's image of "Perfection"...and just about all men don't think about that stuff during sex, more like "OOoooh she's naked! Yaaaa!:".

[Hopeless Dork]

My GF hates her tummy, but I absolutely love it! I think it's a general misconception that men(well at least mature men) need, expect or even want a woman to be the media's image of "Perfection"...and just about all men don't think about that stuff during sex, more like "OOoooh she's naked! Yaaaa!:".

Its hard not to... especially when you've seen the porn your guy looks at and its flawless photoshopped goddess' without a bruise, bump, stretch mark or hair out of place. For me, I feel like thats what turns him on -- perfection.... I've never seen a porn thing he had where the girls were not total super models.. not even just average hottie types.. but supermodel freakishly georgous, barely human.

So while my body is in fairly awesome shape - if I must say so myself (lol) my less than flawless skin (stretch marks on the tummy and a scar here or there) makes me feel repulsive by comparison to those women. It just does.

So... he doesn't ever get to see me all the way naked only partially because of that. He tells me I'm sexy and hot and compliments me all the time, but I feel like I'm serving up a tv dinner to a 4 star restaurant food critic -- all because I saw his porn collection :P

[Texinator]

Porn is not real. The women are merely objects in a fantasy world.

I don't say that to be demeaning but to point out that the appeal is purely visual. That's why the women are manufactured also in the sense that they have implants and lots of other plastic surgery, and the images and films are touched up with editing software to make the changes that not even the plastic surgeons can make.

Many men like to look at porn for the visual stimulation and especially variety. It usually has nothing to do with how they feel about their girlfriends or wives. It is not that your boyfriend settled for you and thinks 'I guess she's the best I can do' but secretly wishes he could be with a porn star. You are far more for him than just a two dimensional image.

A porn star can't have stretch marks because her visual appeal is all she has. No guy watches porn and gets aroused thinking about her personality, her intelligence, or what kind of girlfriend or wife she might be. On the other hand, the appeal of a real woman in a real relationship goes far beyond the visual. That's where things like personality, intelligence, and the dynamic of the relationship matter.

Stretch marks, extra fat, and all that stuff, then becomes irrelevant not because a guy 'settles' for it but because the appeal and source of arousal is so multifaceted that stretch marks and other real or perceived flaws can't put a dent in it.

[dolphinlefty]

Tex, thank you so much for your post. You're obviously a great guy. My guy explained that to me too. He lets me know all the time that that's all those s in porn are, just s. Nothing more. And he always adds something sweet like, "But you, you're my ENTIRE world." haha. Cheesy but I really appreciate it nonetheless. I've seen his porn collection too but then I think, he's with me, not with one of those dumb bimbos. He couldn't respect himself being with one of them cause they don't respect themselves. And that makes me have more respect for myself and just want to give him the best I can when it comes to sex or being sexy for him. He never looks at porn unless we're separated and he's about to explode anyways.

[Hopeless Dork]

Tex, thank you so much for your post. You're obviously a great guy. My guy explained that to me too. He lets me know all the time that that's all those s in porn are, just s. Nothing more. And he always adds something sweet like, "But you, you're my ENTIRE world." haha. Cheesy but I really appreciate it nonetheless. I've seen his porn collection too but then I think, he's with me, not with one of those dumb bimbos. He couldn't respect himself being with one of them cause they don't respect themselves. And that makes me have more respect for myself and just want to give him the best I can when it comes to sex or being sexy for him. He never looks at porn unless we're separated and he's about to explode anyways.

Thats the part that gets to me though, I mean mine is the same, he tells me all the things tex said above... over and over and how porn is boring and i'm so must more exciting and satisfying and I believe that... but whyyyyyyyy do they still do it when they are alone and 'ready to explode' -- do guys NEVER have the capacity to just rub one out WITHOUT staring at other women to make it happen?

I mean , I get it ... oh i do... I just find it annoying is all. I mean for me, looking at a still picture of a naked man would never lead me to an orgasm. Never...lol. Touches and being made to feel desired and wanted are what turn me on to get me there. And when I am alone I THINK of my mans touches and the way he makes me feel to get me there.

Its just hard not to feel inadequate, insulted, annoyed at the fact he is not capable of doing the same.

In other words it just bugs me that he needs OTHER women to have an orgasm when we're apart -- it does something to my heart.