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  • lamakana
    Junior Member
    • Jan 2010
    • 4

    Am I good/bad in bed? I'm confused

    Hi everyone!

    I'm a 29 yrs old guy and I need your help ladies lol.

    Here's my problem: I've been in a few relationships b4
    and the girls always complimented me on how good I was
    in bed, oral, foreplay you name it. lol I'm the kind of guy
    that loves to satisfy his partner in any way. Its been a
    while now I'm with this girl, we love each other, we're very
    attracted to each other. I digress... The problem is I can never
    make her cum through intercourse. The only way I can give her
    an orgasm is through oral or by doing her and stimulating her clit
    simultaneously. And she loves it, she's not complaining at all lol.
    But I'm kind of bothered by this, makes feel insecure about my performance
    since I'd had never experienced that before.

    Sould I worry? Does it happen to you girls?

    Thanks in advance for your input
  • CHANDLERS WISH
    • Mar 2008
    • 22440

    I don't think it's a question of "what" happens with "us" girls

    It's a question that all woman are different and experience different ways of having an Orgasm or not one at all...

    It's nothing to do with your performance, it's obvious that you can bring her to Orgasm, it's to do with her experiences, non-experiences, what she is used to, or how her body reacts.

    Be pleased that yet again, you can bring a woman to Orgasm And, don't feel in-adequate, I am sure with your confidence, you will open the doors to her that she hasn't had opened before, eventually.

    And, if not, then purely understand that is what turns her on the most.

    CW
    PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

    Comment

    • lamakana
      Junior Member
      • Jan 2010
      • 4

      Thanks for your reply! It reassures me.

      I've been reading a lot on the web and I've
      learned that some women will just not come
      thru intercourse no matter what, but that's just
      studies that have been done. |That's why I wanted
      to go straight to the source lol. It's more reassuring!

      Comment

      • newhere808
        Veteran Member
        • Dec 2009
        • 541

        CW pretty much said it all. Another thing to consider is that some women just do not get there through vaginal intercourse and may require stimulation through other means, often the clit.

        Sometimes a "job" well done means getting creative, at least it's not a case of no reaction right?

        Comment

        • CHANDLERS WISH
          • Mar 2008
          • 22440

          I think also, it's mindset That they can't.

          That being that some women can totally let go of all inhibitions when with a man and other's hold a mental block, fear of showing that side of her, the wild side, or the naughty side, the tarty side if I can be blunt....

          Preferring to off course be acceptable in bed, but just can't let go totally...

          One of the best positions I think for vaginal orgasms, is side on, pulling her to you, pushing her outwards away from you, confusing her and making it exciting....

          The point I am trying to make is sometimes, it's not a physcial thing, but mental and over time you may actually jump that hurdle...

          CW
          PUT A LITTLE 'LIKE' IN MY SOUL!

          Comment

          • newhere808
            Veteran Member
            • Dec 2009
            • 541

            Originally posted by CHANDLERS WISH
            I think also, it's mindset That they can't.

            That being that some women can totally let go of all inhibitions when with a man and other's hold a mental block, fear of showing that side of her, the wild side, or the naughty side, the tarty side if I can be blunt....

            Preferring to off course be acceptable in bed, but just can't let go totally...

            One of the best positions I think for vaginal orgasms, is side on, pulling her to you, pushing her outwards away from you, confusing her and making it exciting....

            The point I am trying to make is sometimes, it's not a physcial thing, but mental and over time you may actually jump that hurdle...

            CW
            That's a really good point as well, can make a world of difference.

            Comment

            • lamakana
              Junior Member
              • Jan 2010
              • 4

              Oh yeah she responds very well to clitoral stimulation and she
              cums pretty quick when rubbed there. Both my gf and I have
              had many conversations about it, even her, she says she'd like
              to achieve orgasm through intercourse alone and we've tried many positions
              but it just wont happen lol.

              Comment

              • newhere808
                Veteran Member
                • Dec 2009
                • 541

                Originally posted by lamakana
                Oh yeah she responds very well to clitoral stimulation and she
                cums pretty quick when rubbed there. Both my gf and I have
                had many conversations about it, even her, she says she'd like
                to achieve orgasm through intercourse alone and we've tried many positions
                but it just wont happen lol.
                I know this would technically be cheating, but have you tried a vibe ring? You can get them relatively cheap, trojan has a good one. It will vibe her clit while your penetrating and may bring you two to a happy medium

                Comment

                • lamakana
                  Junior Member
                  • Jan 2010
                  • 4

                  It's a great tip, but we tried it and she says she
                  feels disconfort and asks me to remove it.

                  Thanks for your interest in trying to help

                  Comment

                  • danceintx
                    Veteran Member
                    • Sep 2009
                    • 317

                    I had the same reaction to the vibe ring. Uncomfortable
                    “The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.” - William Arthur Ward

                    Comment

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