[Yvee]

Does anyone have any other suggestions?

[A Dying Breed]

I think if you and your husband really start to explore your body, you won't even need our suggestions

But try buying a kama sutra, or books about tantric sex (I think somebody on this site mentioned "One hour orgasm". Just be spontaneous, and make sure you don't pressure yourself. Because if you pressure yourself too much, you won't have fun. And if you aren't having fun, neither will he. So just read some literature, and learn more about yourself and what you like. And then I'm sure you'll find a sudden surge in the bedroom

[Yvee]

. So just read some literature, and learn more about yourself and what you like.

Except for kama sutra, which you have mentioned, is there anything else that you can recommend?

[A Dying Breed]

Except for kama sutra, which you have mentioned, is there anything else that you can recommend?

There are SO many books out there I don't know where to start. I think it's safe to read if it's written by a professional or someone with years of experience.

Whatever you do, I don't think you should start out with porn or romance novels. They may make you hot, but they set expectations much too high and often leave people disappointed in their own sexual ventures.

I guess ask the women on here who have more experience. I'm in my Mid 20's and 80% of what I've read comes from teh interwebz.
My girlfriend says everything she knows just stems from her vast knowledge and infinite wisdom (which is bull). I'll go interrogate her and see if I can't find out any books she's read

[Yvee]

I'll go interrogate her and see if I can't find out any books she's read

Hehe, please share if you find out anything interesting ))

[A Dying Breed]

Hehe, please share if you find out anything interesting ))

So far, nothing. None of my 'torture' methods are working. She's one tough cookie.

I think I'll try the soft pillows. If not, then the comfy chair. That'll make her talk


However she did say a really good website is clitical.com

(They don't sell any products or anything, just have alot of info and literature. SO please dont label as spam). She said they have sex tutorials and techniques, so good luck there.

Now back to the torture

[CHANDLERS WISH]

I often believe that it's mindset.

Is there something "blocking" you to be free sexually, in your mind?

You say basically that at the beginning of the relationship, it was okay and your still attracted to him but after a while, you feel nothing.

People are therefore, suggesting these books so that you can get in tune with you, your body, yourself and therefore, intimate with your boyfriend.

When you say you don't feel, can you feel him inside of you?

When you say it hurts, to be touched, is he going fast, hard, when he touches you?

This could also be a reason, kind of like " it's him, in-experienced, in how to touch" not you.

CW

[Yvee]

I often believe that it's mindset.

Is there something "blocking" you to be free sexually, in your mind?

You say basically that at the beginning of the relationship, it was okay and your still attracted to him but after a while, you feel nothing.

When you say you don't feel, can you feel him inside of you?

When you say it hurts, to be touched, is he going fast, hard, when he touches you?

This could also be a reason, kind of like " it's him, in-experienced, in how to touch" not you.

CW

No, when I lose feeling I generally stop feeling him inside me... and regardless of what he or I that doesn't change

Maybe he is inexperienced, although I don't think he is. As for the pain when he touches me, its hard to say. Sometimes its the simple fact that he is that brings a pain like feeling

However, I do agree that it may be the mindset, that there may be something that is blocking me from enjoying it.
Recently I've gained some weight and its driving me nuts. Maybe that has something to do with it... me being uncomfortable when I'm naked. Its kind of hard to say!
PLus I don't really know how to battle the whole "mindset" thing =\

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Sorry to ask this question But, when he starts and you get wet, and your body parts open more to accomodate him, then as he goes for a little while, your body parts open more, and then you "maybe" at that point, actually start "nhot feeling him inside of you".. so in-other-words, can it maybe be due to this?

Again, to me, that's mindset, where you are having sex, but really you need to feel love, intimate, in-tune with the rythm, not thinking about, this is going to happen again, therby, not concentrating on the feeling of being loved by him.

How do you battle it?

You have to only think positive.. I know that is hard, but if you are worried about your weight, feel un-confortable about being naked, you are going to feel that during sex and your mind is going to constantly be thinking negative thoughts and your not going to be able to relax and enjoy it for what it is.

Affirmations.

Write on a post it sticker " I am not un-comfortable naked, I am beautiful, vulumptious and sexy"... and read it over and over, daily, until you "get it"

Same, from there, once you have got your mindset around the fact that you are actually beautiful, what ever else seems "negative" do the same thing, write it down and re-read daily...

You must believe, love yourself, in order to feel and in order to not give a ... at all, because your free, and your happy within yourself.

CW

[Yvee]

That actually sounds like a good idea))
Thanks!