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  • ria9107
    Junior Member
    • Jun 2010
    • 3

    sex drive .

    i'm eighteen, i had a boyfriend for a year and a half , & we had protected sex all the time, we had a very good sex life, & we would do it 2-4 times a day, we broke up a year ago, and i had a few protected one night stands since then, but now i don't have a sex drive, i don't feel like i wanna have sex with anyone, at all, & it scares me because at this age i'm suppose to have a HIGH sex drive, any ideas of what could be going on ?
  • LanaBear
    Veteran Member
    • Jul 2009
    • 8373

    First, disregard the whole age vs sex drive thing... It's all speculation and everybody is different.

    How is your self esteem and general outlook on life? Anything major going on? Stress? Graduation?

    With some people, your sexual drive may come and go throughout your life time. Maybe you won't have a sexual drive until you click with some guy on a bunch of different levels to desire HIM. One night stands are hard, I don't think it is fair to you to judge your sex drive based on that hun.

    Comment

    • ria9107
      Junior Member
      • Jun 2010
      • 3

      now that you put that out there, i definitely agree, maybe i really do have to like someone in order for my sex drive to be high again, and i do have a lot of stress going on, i'm starting college and a lot of other issues, so it can be that, thanks.





      Originally posted by LanaBear
      First, disregard the whole age vs sex drive thing... It's all speculation and everybody is different.

      How is your self esteem and general outlook on life? Anything major going on? Stress? Graduation?

      With some people, your sexual drive may come and go throughout your life time. Maybe you won't have a sexual drive until you click with some guy on a bunch of different levels to desire HIM. One night stands are hard, I don't think it is fair to you to judge your sex drive based on that hun.

      Comment

      • jns
        Assistant Admin
        • Mar 2010
        • 8398

        He climaxed 2 to 4 times a day. How often did you climax? Do you climax now and how often if you do? Women sometimes have higher sex drives later in life.
        I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
        ...
        Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

        From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

        Comment

        • ria9107
          Junior Member
          • Jun 2010
          • 3

          Originally posted by jns
          He climaxed 2 to 4 times a day. How often did you climax? Do you climax now and how often if you do? Women sometimes have higher sex drives later in life.
          i always climaxed with him, he was my first, after him i did have a boyfriend for 6 months and i hardly climaxed with him at all, i had to masturbate during sex in order to climax, but i liked our sex, i just didn't really climax for some reason, pretty weird .

          Comment

          • LanaBear
            Veteran Member
            • Jul 2009
            • 8373

            Originally posted by ria9107
            i always climaxed with him, he was my first, after him i did have a boyfriend for 6 months and i hardly climaxed with him at all, i had to masturbate during sex in order to climax, but i liked our sex, i just didn't really climax for some reason, pretty weird .
            I don't think that's weird... You may just need a deeper connection to be satisfied sexually by someone. You had that will your first, long term boyfriend. Not saying that 6 months isn't long enough for that kind of connection to develop, but you will know when you click with someone, hopefully you will know it before 6 months.

            Comment

            • jns
              Assistant Admin
              • Mar 2010
              • 8398

              Do you still masturbate? It sounds like you didn't get the same results with the second boyfriend as you did with the first one and had to do the job yourself. This may have broken the link between having a boyfriend to love and to climax with. In other words, the link between the intimacy and the sex. Finding the right guy should relink those things. Do you like teasing or flirting? They may strengthen your libido.
              I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
              ...
              Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

              From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

              Comment

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