[Guest]

As two people get more comfortable with their lovemaking, though, it becomes easier to see it as natural and enjoyable and not "dirty."

Women are incapable of seeing sex as natural and enjoyable, women see sex as dirty and gross and thats that.

[Day Tripper]

All women are like that. Women in general think sex is dirty and gross so if you find a new woman it will be exactly the same so you might aswell stay with her and accept the fact that women simply do not like sex.

If I had a girl I would be more worried if she actually liked sex, because as far as I'm concerned it's not normal for a woman to like sex and not think it's disgusting.

Knightrider, I mean no disrespect, but, what planet you are from? I've never in my life been in a relationship with a woman that didn't like or enjoy sex.

[Hopeless Dork]

Knightrider.... perhaps in your personal experience women find sex destestible but its usually relative to the kind of sex they are having, who they are having it with etc. If you feel women that enjoy sex are weirdos... its likely you give off the vibe that sex isnt supposed to be pleasurable for them.. thus making it not enjoyable to them... thus them not liking sex... which gets you to the vicious cycle of thinking normal women hate sex... which just isn't true.

We are the only gender that has a body part that serves no other function but to provide sexual pleasure (google it ) Also the female orgasm helps facilitate sperm to the egg more efficiantly... we were made to enjoy sex just as much as men are.

The problem is a lot of women are raised with attitudes like yours that place a mental block, "they aren't supposed to like it" and that can be a hard thing for some women to get over. Most/Many do.

[WildChild]

All women are like that. Women in general think sex is dirty and gross so if you find a new woman it will be exactly the same so you might aswell stay with her and accept the fact that women simply do not like sex.

If I had a girl I would be more worried if she actually liked sex, because as far as I'm concerned it's not normal for a woman to like sex and not think it's disgusting.

Returning troll. Bye bye darling.

[Texasred]

I started to reply to "Knightrider" when I saw his first silly post on Page 1 of this thread, but instead I went and microwaved a bag of popcorn and turned to page two...
:-)

[jns]

All women are like that. Women in general think sex is dirty and gross so if you find a new woman it will be exactly the same so you might aswell stay with her and accept the fact that women simply do not like sex.

If I had a girl I would be more worried if she actually liked sex, because as far as I'm concerned it's not normal for a woman to like sex and not think it's disgusting.

Unfortunately, there are some men who believe this to be true, in fact there may be whole cultures (google female genital mutilation). I really pity them in that they will never experience what normal people do.

[Sunflowerr]

I think it sounds like the best method would just be patience, if you really want to be with her. Talk openly with her about sex without applying too much pressure. Don't tell her about the things you need, just try and let her know that there are other ways of thinking and healthier ways to think about her body. And, like Texasred says, show her that you are about her pleasure and show her how good sexual pleasure can be. Even if she doesn't come when you eat her out, she'll still enjoy it.

Just let her decide what she is comfortable with and hope that she becomes more comfortable over time. This stuff is probably deep seated. If she thinks that masterbation is dirty (and, by extension, her own body and sexual pleasure), this is probably bs that she's been systematically fed since childhood and all that pressuring her would do is make her resent you. And if she does go through with it just to please you, she might feel alot of shame.

Ultimately, I think you need to decide where you could handle potentially living a life with someone whose feelings with regards to sex are so vastly different from yours, because she might never get past those feelings.

I also don't think you are being selfish. I think it's perfectly healthy to want an active and diverse sex life. Being frustrated sexually can lead to frustration with the whole relationship. I know that I probably wouldn't last very long in your shoes. Sex is important. It might sound shallow, but for me, it's one of the most important things in the relationship.

[mommies3]

i think she will get over her insecure dirty feelings in due time. Positve encouragement on discovering herself is good either with you or without. I still dont do that in front of my husband, even after 14 yrs. I really dont think you should expect drastic changes, small little ones yes, but dont pressure her that will only prolong the process.
As far as oral for you that shouldnt be a deal breaker. Why do you have a BJ? It is a two way street make sure both of you are pleasured and satisfied, thats what matters. I dont like giving them either, i do on occasion. I dont swallow and my husband doesnt mind. I just asked him if that would be a deal breaker for him and he said NO that there were too many other things he LOVED about me to let that matter. Granted i dont think you have hit the love stage yet but it shouldnt matter in my opinion. Thats just the way i look at it.

[mommies3]

Women are incapable of seeing sex as natural and enjoyable, women see sex as dirty and gross and thats that.

I BEG to DIFFER. I see sex as very natural and very pleasurable. Have you had some kind of unpleasurable experience to make you think this? I am only one woman but you are way off base with that statement.

[justcuriouz]

My suggestion is to keep trying to get her to loosen up, but ONLY if you love her. Otherwise, it would be purely selfish. It's still somewhat selfish, but I myself can understand having sexual wants that are not getting met, so I think it's excusable. After all, we're human. That said, if her beliefs are deeply ingrained, it may not be possible to change her.