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  • Texasred
    Veteran Member
    • Oct 2009
    • 1216

    The boyfriend can do better if he wants to, but that last part is key.

    Yes, continuing after orgasm can be uncomfortable - the first time it happens - but with a little practice, that sensation of intense sensitivity can be managed and even enjoyed. Sometimes it only requires the briefest pause before continuing with the acitivity that produced the orgasm, and *some*times this can even result in a second orgasm even more intense than the first, but this has only happened to me a very few (very memorable!) times. The more difficult feeling to manage is that feeling of extreme lassitude that occurs when the orgasm is completely over, the feeling of just wanting to crawl off (into a cave somewhere?) and go to sleep.

    But...and this is a very important "but" - this feeling also can be managed, with effort and with practice, but the rewards are worth it in terms of a satisfied partner, and just speaking for myself here, in taking part in "afterplay" that can either turn into "foreplay" or launch the anticipation for our next encounter.

    So, what I'm getting at is this: if a man understands what he's going to experience, he can manage it; and if he has consideration for his partner and her needs, this post-orgasmic sleepiness is no excuse. It's a reason, but it's no excuse.

    Comment

    • Texasred
      Veteran Member
      • Oct 2009
      • 1216

      Originally posted by Hopeless Dork
      I don't understand that part since most men are snoring within 10 minutes of orgasm... thats not preparing to fight!! lol
      Well, it's been said that my snoring is deadly to man or beast - and now I know why: evolution!

      Comment

      • Hopeless Dork
        Veteran Member
        • Dec 2008
        • 4255

        Haha tex!! I think your last post was pretty insightful. I think sometimes women get insecure after a guy goes quiet, falls asleep or is a bit distant (emotionally) after orgasm... they wonder what he's thinking, etc.. and its kind of reassuring in a way to hear that you guys just kind of want to crawl in a hole and hybernate... that just goes to show the effort on the part of the guys that stick around a cuddle a bit first!!

        I use to worry when my guy was too quiet after sex that maybe he wasn't happy with our play but soon realized he was just super relaxed :P
        Scars remind us of where we've been...they don't have to dictate where we're going.

        Comment

        • Rediscovered
          Senior Member
          • Feb 2010
          • 118

          Originally posted by Texasred
          The more difficult feeling to manage is that feeling of extreme lassitude that occurs when the orgasm is completely over, the feeling of just wanting to crawl off (into a cave somewhere?) and go to sleep.
          My lover and I only see each other on weekends and since he doesn't like that feeling you describe (it's OVER, just DONE), he has started withholding orgasm (until perhaps our last lovemaking session right before he leaves for home).

          We do everything we normally do, but slower and gentler (and longer!) and he has lots of non-ejaculatory orgasms, but doesn't go for the big one. This has allowed *me* to relax and have much more enjoyment (meaning orgasms!). Plus, he never *leaves* after sex (mentally nor physically). The strong closeness stays with us throughout the entire weekend.

          Needless to say, I am enjoying this immensely. :-)

          Comment

          • Texasred
            Veteran Member
            • Oct 2009
            • 1216

            Originally posted by Hopeless Dork

            I use to worry when my guy was too quiet after sex that maybe he wasn't happy with our play but soon realized he was just super relaxed :P
            That's it exactly!
            I've found if I can fight off that relaxed feeling for maybe 5 minutes, maybe even less, it goes away and I can return to normal, and my interest in lovemaking returns.
            But that 5 minutes feels like 5 hours... ;-)
            Last edited by Texasred; 08-24-2010, 08:52 PM. Reason: edited for clarity

            Comment

            • Texasred
              Veteran Member
              • Oct 2009
              • 1216

              Originally posted by Rediscovered
              My lover and I only see each other on weekends and since he doesn't like that feeling you describe (it's OVER, just DONE), he has started withholding orgasm (until perhaps our last lovemaking session right before he leaves for home).
              That feeling can be an acquired taste...
              Originally posted by Rediscovered
              We do everything we normally do, but slower and gentler (and longer!) and he has lots of non-ejaculatory orgasms, but doesn't go for the big one. This has allowed *me* to relax and have much more enjoyment (meaning orgasms!). Plus, he never *leaves* after sex (mentally nor physically). The strong closeness stays with us throughout the entire weekend.

              Needless to say, I am enjoying this immensely. :-)
              And THAT is a great way to do it!
              He sounds like a very considerate lover. Or very smart...

              Comment

              • T-man
                Member
                • Jul 2010
                • 31

                Why us guys fall asleep!

                So some scientist say, us guys fall asleep upon ejaculation so that we don't wander off and find another women to inseminate, so we're still there in the morning to protect the woman from any sabre toothed tigers wandering round the cave complex.

                Why do girls not fall asleep??? maybe so they can head off and find another man to look after them and then sneak back in the morning! lol I don't really know. But I do understand how you girls feel. Let me explain.


                When guys ejaculate we just feel conked and sleepy. But it's not because we are tired from (all the work we've been doing ) but it's because we get in such a state of relaxation that we just want to go with it and enjoy the feeling, infact to cut that short detracts from the experience. hmm it's really nice. That said, after about 5 mins we can wake up and get back to normal again no problem. I suppose it depends on the stage of the love making session. If it is a quicky, well no one is going to sleep after that, back to watching tv right. If it's the beginning of a long session it's on to petting, kissing whilst recharging and if it's the end of a long session its roll over and dream time. Oh an yes, after we ejaculate the head is just incredibly sensitive, it can almost feel like pain if it's overly stimulated, then again with just the right amount of pressure it can feel fantastic.

                Anyway, if us guys orgasm without ejaculating, which very few do, then it's a whole different story. Then I do feel energised and totally ready for more, just like you girls. I don't need to recharge as nothing has been discharged!! So, why do we fall asleep after orgasm + ejaculation and not after orgasm alone??? Well, maybe that whole knock a guy out if he's possibly produced a baby so he's still round in the morning thingy has a grain of truth to it after all!

                Comment

                • shyone99
                  Junior Member
                  • Aug 2010
                  • 7

                  Oral first, then sex.

                  Comment

                  • jns
                    Assistant Admin
                    • Mar 2010
                    • 8398

                    Originally posted by T-man
                    Why do girls not fall asleep???
                    But they do: if you tire them out with enough orgasms they fall into a beautiful, blissful sleep.

                    Have you ever had a girl ask you to stop because she tired from orgasming? I have. Then you hug and kiss a little bit and she falls asleep with a smile on her face.
                    I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
                    ...
                    Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

                    From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

                    Comment

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