[chik]

Hi,

I am 28 yrs old and haven't had sex till now. I have been trying to have sex for some time now but have been having difficulties. My vaginal muscles seem to clam up when my partner tries to penetrate.
Also, I don't get very wet which was initially not a problem.

Has anyone faced similar issues or have suggestions how to overcome this?

[Mes T]

Does your partner engage in foreplay? Are you properly aroused before penetration? Can you orgasm, and does your partner know how to do that for you? Do you have this same issue with the muscles clamping when you're using a tampon or just your own finger? Is sex in general a "scary" thing for you? Did anyone ever try to instill messages while you were growing up to frighten you away from sex?

That is possibly... the longest string of questions I've ever typed. Essentially we need a little more information before we can give advice I think...

[cocoa]

Hi,

I am 28 yrs old and haven't had sex till now. I have been trying to have sex for some time now but have been having difficulties. My vaginal muscles seem to clam up when my partner tries to penetrate.
Also, I don't get very wet which was initially not a problem.

Has anyone faced similar issues or have suggestions how to overcome this?

It's probably a result of not having been sexually active. Give yourself some time. As the previous poster said, foreplay may help to relax your body so that you feel more receptive. Are you experiencing any pressure to perform - whether self imposed or from your partner? What sets the tone or mood before you proceed?

[panda87]

Bing new to this situation myself... I noticed a few physical things:

First of, I have a very small pelvis, which made it quite difficult... If this is the case for you, maybe try different positions until you find something comfy Also, changing positions will change the angle as well.. I find myself being more upright is much easier

Also, lube is good!!! If you are fairly dry when he tries, your body probably goes 'no way'.. Silicone lube is nice and slippery and lasts a while too, making things a lot more comfortable!

All the best

[jns]

Echoing Mes_T, do you orgasm? Can your bf cause you to orgasm before penetration? Multiple times? Does your bf give you oral? Multiple orgasms should leave you well lubricated, but oral could do a better job. And of course, store bought lubricant works, also. Orgasms will help your body be more accommodating to penetration.