[Khiindii]

I don't know where to start...
I'm 20 years old

I'm slightly over weight

I'm shy

I'm afraid to talk to guys

I'm afraid of rejection

I'm tired of being alone, but I've been that way for so long that I'm used to and comfortable with it; yet hate it at the same time

I'm insecure and uncomfortable with my body

I'm so horny some times I could cry

I've never orgasmed or had a real "love making" experience

Some times I think my g-spot or sex drive is broken
( I know that sounds really stupid but that is how it feels some times)

I've only ever had one boyfriend/sexpartner and all he ever wanted or cared about was pleasing himself

I just don't know what to say or do or who to talk to

Does any one here have any suggestions or tips?

[CHANDLERS WISH]

So what your telling us is your a normal young lady, who spends too much time alone, and wants what everyone wants

Welcome to the Forum..

Okay, well you have alot on your wish list there and you've developed probably a pattern that you need to change, also you had a bad experience, trust me when I say that not all men are into themselves, not even the young ones.....

You have to start with you before you start looking for what your after....

Your shy....
Your slightly overweight
Your in-secure
Your uncomfortable with your body
Your afraid to talk to guys
Your afraid of rejection
You have a high sex drive
You want a boy to actually be equal not selfish
You'd like to experience an orgasm

So if you start with yourself, you have to work on the first step, getting over the in-security....

For instance, instead of sitting on the lounge? Walk around the house, instead of taking a lift, walk the stairs, every opportunity you can get and if your in a safe neighbourhood start walking........it's peaceful as well as putting you in better shape.

View what your eating pattern is, breakfast, lunch, dinner, tell us here if you like and we'll swap some foods and ban some others.

Look at your hair, dress sense, can you afford to get a small change, colour, cut, top? Spoil yourself a little and tell yourself, yay, this is it I'm on a new journey..

Join a club something to do with a hobby and mix and mingle and gain new friends and get out there.

From there, you can be shy body language tells men your interested, but you have to start with all the above first,and work it, work on it and mean it and believe it can happen.....

You could have casual sex but then you'll be treated as thanks mam so I don't think that's the answer, rather all of the above first....

We also have a thread, post pictures of yourself on this Forum in the Lounge, why not post your picture And, make some friends here, you'll soon gain knowledge and friends and confidence, trust me except you may get addicted

CW

[LilahX]

Start by knowing that you don't have to be slim, or gorgeous, outgoing or experienced to be sexy and attractive to guys. What men, the ones who are worth giving your time to, find confidence the number one sexy characteristic in women. As Chandler's Wish advises, work on yourself and when you feel great about who you are it will shine thru and the rest will follow.

If you're horny then your libido certainly isn't broken. Indulge yourself and learn about your sexuality. Discover what your body likes, what you like. Educate yourself about yourself and about sex so when you're ready to go down that road you'll be well prepared.

[rcoreyus]

How you feel about yourself has a bigger effect on how attractive you are to men, than your physical appearance. You say you are slightly overweight - really, or are you just comparing to skinny models. Not all men like the traditional thin, big-breasted women - lots like different body styles, or don't particularly care.

I know its difficult to do, but if you can work to boost your self-confidence, you will do much better.

[Khiindii]

Reply

So what your telling us is your a normal young lady, who spends too much time alone, and wants what everyone wants

Welcome to the Forum..

For instance, instead of sitting on the lounge? Walk around the house, instead of taking a lift, walk the stairs, every opportunity you can get and if your in a safe neighbourhood start walking........it's peaceful as well as putting you in better shape.

I admit that since reading is one of my favorite pass times I do sit around quite a bit. However, I do do a lot of up and down on the stairs that go up to my room, I walk from my house to my aunt's and grandparent's homes quite a bit, I run around the ten acres we own with my little brother and cousin playing some game they made up called zombies that wears you out, and my dad is getting ready to fix a treadmill for my mom and I and I'll be using it a lot when it is fixed.

View what your eating pattern is, breakfast, lunch, dinner, tell us here if you like and we'll swap some foods and ban some others.

I know my eating habits live on the corners of "you don't need that" and "your diet really sucks" I'm addicted to pasta, pizza, stews, red meat, chocolate, ice-cream, coke, and tea. My family and I will be moving into our new house soon though and we are very serious about changing the way we eat to more fruits, vegetables, white meat, and water.

Look at your hair, dress sense, can you afford to get a small change, colour, cut, top? Spoil yourself a little and tell yourself, yay, this is it I'm on a new journey..

I'm a big country girl and things like dresses, skirts, and heels don't really appeal to me. I like t-shirts, jeans, and sneakers. My hair is really frizzy and curly so the only thing I ever do with it is ponytail and hat. It refuses to work with me any other way.

Join a club something to do with a hobby and mix and mingle and gain new friends and get out there.

I don't think we have any thing like that around here. At least not that I know of.

You could have casual sex but then you'll be treated as thanks mam so I don't think that's the answer, rather all of the above first....

I don't think that is what I'm looking for >.<

We also have a thread, post pictures of yourself on this Forum in the Lounge, why not post your picture And, make some friends here, you'll soon gain knowledge and friends and confidence, trust me except you may get addicted
CW

I'll post a pic as soon as I get hold of a computer. My phone won't let me upload pics to the net.

[Khiindii]

Reply 2

How you feel about yourself has a bigger effect on how attractive you are to men, than your physical appearance. You say you are slightly overweight - really, or are you just comparing to skinny models. Not all men like the traditional thin, big-breasted women - lots like different body styles, or don't particularly care.

I know its difficult to do, but if you can work to boost your self-confidence, you will do much better.

I don't even think my self-esteem level is on the grid it's so low. I know I'm not overtly over weight but I'm a good 15 to 25 pounds over weight.
It is also loads easier for me to believe all the negatives I hear about myself from others than the few positives I get. For example: the people at work are always calling me weird because I like to go out to my car and read while I eat on my lunch and break. They called me ghetto booty for a long time because they said I had a big butt. My ex once told me my butt was so big that when I laid on my back my butt cheeks squished together and made it look like I had balls. Very sexy and supportive right there. >.> I've been told by both sets of grandparents on a few occasions that I'm over weight. Any way, just a lot of negativity from people.
I try to follow Something a character in one of my books once said. She says that perhaps people's good qualities are like the umeboshi on onigiri, stuck on their backs. It is so easy for you to see the good umeboshi on the backs of others and envy them what they have than it is to see your own and enjoy it. I just haven't been able to find my umeboshi yet.

[Texinator]

What is your height and weight, if you don't mind me asking? People shouldn't be putting you down like that anyway, but it doesn't really sound like you are "big" either.

Not that it really matters. It's the people who feel the need to make comments about you, especially to your face, that have a problem. They're probably even more insecure if they need to boost their ego by attacking you like that.

[Khiindii]

What is your height and weight, if you don't mind me asking? People shouldn't be putting you down like that anyway, but it doesn't really sound like you are "big" either.

Not that it really matters. It's the people who feel the need to make comments about you, especially to your face, that have a problem. They're probably even more insecure if they need to boost their ego by attacking you like that.

My height is 5' 2" my weight is around 155 to 165 I haven't weighed in a while.

[Texinator]

I reckon weight should be considered a problem only if it is leading to some other medical issues. Other than that, how much you should weigh is up to, and not for others to decide.

Do the others tell you that you're weird in a condescending manner or with a bit of humor?

[Guest]

I don't even think my self-esteem level is on the grid it's so low. I know I'm not overtly over weight but I'm a good 15 to 25 pounds over weight.
It is also loads easier for me to believe all the negatives I hear about myself from others than the few positives I get. For example: the people at work are always calling me weird because I like to go out to my car and read while I eat on my lunch and break. They called me ghetto booty for a long time because they said I had a big butt. My ex once told me my butt was so big that when I laid on my back my butt cheeks squished together and made it look like I had balls. Very sexy and supportive right there. >.> I've been told by both sets of grandparents on a few occasions that I'm over weight. Any way, just a lot of negativity from people.
I try to follow Something a character in one of my books once said. She says that perhaps people's good qualities are like the umeboshi on onigiri, stuck on their backs. It is so easy for you to see the good umeboshi on the backs of others and envy them what they have than it is to see your own and enjoy it. I just haven't been able to find my umeboshi yet.

first of all...most girls have no idea what their ideal weight should be.

girls who are perfect, think they need to lose 5 or 10 lbs, when they would still be banging hot if they gained 5 or 10. so don't worry about your weight unless a medical professional tells you need to.

but the benefitis of maintaining a healthy weight include things like lowering your risk of getting type 2 Diabetes Mellitus and also reduce your risk of developing breast cancer when you get older. so being healthy is always a good first step.