[phoebe]

Thank you for sharing this. I really wish I had answers for you, but I am unintentionally putting my boyfriend through the same thing. We've been together for 5 years now and over the last couple years I've been losing my desire to have sex and lately it's been completely gone. He is a wonderful person, he sounds a lot like you. I am working and also in school full time and so stressed out and exhausted a lot and he has been amazing at picking up extra chores, cleaning the house, being there for me...I really do see what he is doing and I appreciate it so much. I am completely attracted to him, but I just can't make myself want sex. When we do have sex, it's because I am making myself do it for his sake and he can tell. We've talked about breaking up, but we are so in love that we don't want to. We used to not talk about it very much and then he would get frustrated and burst out all of a sudden and we would have a terrible fight, and we never ever used to fight. But lately we've really been working on talking about our feelings. It's very frustrating to me that I can't get over not wanting to have sex with a person I love so much, and when I do, I really don't even feel anything, I'm just waiting for it to be over. I'm also not big on oral, I guess I find it kinda gross too. I recognize all of this in me, and yet I can't change it. Maybe try talking to her about that. She might be frustrated with herself too and just doesn't know how to explain it. I'm on the pill, but I've changed which one I am taking to see if that's the problem and it hasn't helped, so it scares me that I might not be able to fix this. Anyways, I hope from the bottom of my heart that things work out for you and you find happiness, I know how hard of a situation this is to go through.

[phoebe]

Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize the thread went on for two pages and I just read your decision to break up. I am so glad you were able to figure out what the best path is for you to find happiness. Break ups are never easy to do, but sometimes they are truly for the best when relationships cause those in them so much unhappiness.

[Sumerain]

hi there , i have the similar problem with my boyfriend , my advice ....google Asexuality......