[CuriousChica]

so i love my mother dearly and we have grown so much closer over the years. i dnt tell her everything but i dnt like to lie to her, if she ask i will let her kno...lately shes been asking me if i have had sex yet, although with difficulty i tell her no everytime. i want to tell her soon but idk how and idk how she will react or what she will think...

any delightful tips?

[stressed]

How old are you, and, has your mom met your boyfriend yet?

[CuriousChica]

19 and i have no boyfriend currently im not active but the guy i was with yes of course she knows him

[stressed]

Hmmm I think it's alright to tell her you have (now that I've also read your other post).

Is she religious? Does she believe in no sex before marriage? It also depends on the mom, the culture etc. but no mom reacts badly really, especially when you're so close. She may "lecture" you a little bit about being safe, going to the gyn often etc. but nothing bad can happen.

[CuriousChica]

thanks... and we r religious but idk what her views on sex are....

[chaya]

I would never lie to my mother. If you don't want to tell her the truth, just tell her it's none of her business and let her draw her own conclusions. IMO that is better than telling a lie that both of you may remember for a long time.

[vancityguy]

my buddy who was a guy, actually had the same problem, but his familly was VERY religous, he ended up getting the girl pregnant and now there engaged so it all worked out fine for them, but back to your question...Its your motherm she loves you know matter what...put yourself in her shoes....would you want to know if YOUR daughter was active? i understand the nervousness off it all, but remember this....you got here some how

[auntie_awesome]

Why not just start by asking her what her views on sex are? You can simply start the conversation by saying "Mom, I'm 19 and we've never had a really serious discussion about your views on sex and I'd like to have one with you". Do you live at home?

If not, there really isn't reason to tell her if you don't want to. Just make sure you are being safe. Some moms completely say "I don't want to talk about it LALALALALA" (mind actually did this). If that is the case, talk it over with Planned Parenthood instead of your mom. It's not anything more than a counselor session to give you some extra information about sex, protection, and the responsibilities that comes from it.

If you want to continue the conversation with your mom, remember that you are an adult but if you are living at their home you should show some consideration to their rules. Be patient with her as well, if she is negative, it might take approaching it with her a few times before she finally talks with you openly.

The one time my mom actually ventured out and asked ME about my sex life and if I was still a virgin, I replied with "Is that an answer you really want to know mom?"...she thought about it, said "No" and that was that. She knew, but sometimes they really don't need a confirmation from us you know?

[jellybean93]

My mom hasn't asked, because she doesn't think I have, but she asked if I knew about safe sex one day and I told her I did, and I loved her, and she left me alone about it. I think she knows, but she didn't freak out. We're really close, so I figure she'd deal with my sex life when I started dealing with hers. I think if you just say yes she'll make sure you are being safe and tell you to see a gyne frequently.