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  • hilal
    Junior Member
    • Jun 2009
    • 4

    masturbation,oral sex and orgasm...

    ok..here it is ..
    my boyfriend and i have been trying oral sex for a while.both of us like it but the problem is i cant orgasm or feel sth sensitive much.my vajina gets wet but it doesnt change anything.he tries hard but just it doesnt happen.he touchs my clitoris .again.nothing happens.
    i already have a problem with masturbation.my clitoris doesnt make me feel good as its supposed to i think..i feel horny when i touch it but after a while it stops.i finger myself . but it doesnt feel like sth good too..so i cant get wet anymore it gets dry and starts to hurt me .
    i really dont know what to do..and also my boyfriend feels bad about that as he thinks he is not good enough and thats the problem.but i dont think so . the problem is me not him .it totally freaks me out ..

    oh and im a virgin by the way . just let u know in case it may be importent for this situation..
  • waya
    Veteran Member
    • Oct 2010
    • 206

    Contrary to popular belief, receiving oral sex isn't necessarily everyone's favorite thing and not everyone who enjoys it can have an orgasm that way. It will probably be difficult for him to make you orgasm if you've never experienced one. Sometimes it takes a lot of experimenting to figure out what your body needs to get you there. There is no reason to freak out, though You are not abnormal. There's a learning curve when it comes to sexual stuff.

    Comment

    • oxy-moron
      Veteran Member
      • Oct 2010
      • 551

      To start with light clit stimulation does not work on all ladies and that is why Oral is not as effective on all ladies.
      You can get him to be a bit rougher - he has probably been told that all clits need to be treated lightly and carefully. provided you are giving him feedback he wont hurt you.
      Tell him to try the same sort of frequency he would use on himself-that type of frequency is difficult to reach with light stroking but easily reached with a finger flicking motion.
      You need to regulate how much pressure he uses while he is learning. Use lube on your clit as well. If you pull the skin of your mons away from clit it will boost the level of feeling- this works well with the lube.
      The other thing to try is to get him to lube his whole palm and use his palm on your whole mons ,clit and labia area - starting slow and getting faster- give him feedback on motion and pressure. He can also run his middle finger in as part of the motion(lube important as well). The finger follows round and up the front wall of the vagina as it goes in and out- sorry but it is hard to describe.
      Just trying different things will get you there eventually.

      Comment

      • jns
        Assistant Admin
        • Mar 2010
        • 8398

        You might want to try some fantasy stuff as a way to get excited, such as restraints. Make sure you have a safe word that will have him stop and release you. Fantasy stuff could excite you mentally causing heightened physical excitation.
        I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided, and that is the lamp of experience.
        ...
        Shall we gather strength by irresolution and inaction? Shall we acquire the means of effectual resistance by lying supinely on our backs and hugging the delusive phantom of hope, until our enemies shall have bound us hand and foot?

        From a speech by Patrick Henry on March 23, 1775 at St. John's Church, Richmond, Virginia

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