[chesty2141]

Ok so we have been dating for over a year now. When we first met I couldn't get her to keep her hands off me. It didn't matter where we were. After a few months it started to slow down but she still had a little wild side. She had to get a shot to help with endometriosis that induced menopause. I think it was called Lupron. Even during the shot sex was not an issue, But for the past 4 or 5 months sex is completely scarce. usually once a week. Its also short and to the point and she doesnt want it anywhere but the bedroom now. I have tried talking to her, giving intimacy, pampering, and even just trying to "make a move". It always ends with "No". She can't orgasm either. She says she tried to masturbate and she couldn't even get it herself anymore. I don't know what to do or if there is a way to treat this, but its very frustrating to have a happy healthy sex life with someone I love at one point and then it just goes away. Is there any suggestions on what I can do to help with this. I want things to be the way they use to be and she claims she does as well....... Help!!

[oxy-moron]

Hi
from the ivfsuccessprogram site,

While the drug is relatively harmless, Lupron tends to make women experience menopause-like symptoms because of the crash in estrogen levels. The side effects of Lupron vary from woman to woman; some women go through a cycle without feeling any discomfort, while others experience the full regalia of menopause symptoms – nausea, hot flashes, burning sensations, etc. The intensity and duration of the side effects also vary. Most women no longer feel them once they stop taking Lupron. Although you cannot stop taking Lupron until your doctor says so, there are ways to reduce its side effects.

Acupuncture

Aside from increasing the number of mature eggs and enhancing the overall success of the IVF cycle, acupuncture can also suppress the side effects of Lupron, particularly the hot flashes. Experts are not sure if this happens because acupuncture makes you relaxed or if it is the result of treatment itself. In any case, it wouldn’t hurt to give it a try, and a number of insurance plans cover acupuncture and traditional Chinese medicine.

Exercise

Never underestimate exercise’s ability to affect your overall well-being. Anecdotal evidence shows that exercise can improve the whole gamut of Lupron side effects, from the mood swings to the sleep disturbances. Try exercise for thirty minutes a day, but don’t over-exert yourself. Practices like yoga and gentle walking are good choices.

Flaxseed oil

Milled flax and flaxseed oil contain substances that reduce hot flashes and breast pain if used every day. Flaxseed also contains omega-3 fatty acids, a type of fat that aids in mood stabilization because of its effects on neuronal functions.

Deep breathing techniques

Depression and other uncomfortable side effects of Lupron can also be reduced by relaxation techniques and deep-breathing exercises. Try this deep breathing technique whenever you feel a hot flash coming: breath slowly through your noise and count from one to five. Exhale slowly through your mouth, counting again from one to five.

Valerian root tea

Valerian root tea is an herbal remedy that helps relieve anxiety and induces relaxation. This is a good tonic to help you get through any stressful time and it also has been known to boost fertility. Consult your doctor before you take any herbal remedies.

Melatonin

Insomnia is a troublesome side effect to deal with, but melatonin can help you sleep on time. Melatonin is the hormone produced by the body to trigger sleepiness at night. It is available in small doses and can help you get back to your regular sleep patterns.

Good luck

[oxy-moron]

You are right WC - more sex would work out to be beneficial as well if she gets over the hurdle- Its use it or lose it in the long run.

[oxy-moron]

Time stamping on these posts has gone out of whack! Someone needs to check the server clock.

[WildChild]

Good info Oxy. Being perimenopausal I can attest to the effectiveness of exercise, diet, breathing and meditation. I find that frequent sex is very helpful too!

[chesty2141]

She has been off the shot now for 5 months. Sorry I must have failed to mention that. My concern is that now that she is off will it ever come back or is there anything we can do to help her become interested again? She will have sex occassionally just to keep me happy, but I'm not the kind of person to want sex unless it's wanted by both partners. I personally find it selfish and rude to accept sex if she doesn't want it herself. Her and I both just want her to have sex because she wants it, not because her boyfriend keeps, as she calls it, "Humping her leg"

[chesty2141]

It's just stressful on both of us because we are 25 years old and theres no young energetic spark anymore like it use to be before this shot. It kills me because I'm an energetic gym rat. It kills her because she was a very sexual person when we met and now she isn't and wants to be.

[Ashlee T.]

Think of it like this....... what if you were having to take a medication and one of the side effects happened to be that you were incapable of getting an erection? How would you want/expect her to react to that?

Its good to be concerned, to be watchful.....but there's no reason in this situation (from what you've told us) to believe that this is anything other than a medical issue for her that she has zero control over.

In addition to the Lupron and the mimicking of menopausal symptoms, endometriosis is a very painful thing and makes lots of women dread intercourse.

Be patient with her. It sounds like she's doing the best she can right now and it may just take some time. And, go back to my original question, what if for some medical reason you could no longer get an erection?

[Texasred]

Think of it like this....... what if you were having to take a medication and one of the side effects happened to be that you were incapable of getting an erection? How would you want/expect her to react to that?

That condition at least is readily treatable; hers might not be.
OTOH, the treatment might be as simple as hormone replacement therapy, if that's consistent with treatment for endometriosis.
The trick might be finding a doctor who thinks that a normal sex life is immportant.