[Mouse37]

When my boyfriend and I have sex I feel nothing. I can feel him there... maybe some pressure but absolutely no pleasure. I am well aware that some women just do not get anything out of "penetration", which in all honesty is disappointing, but is there anything that I can do to maybe help the situation?

Are there any positions that may help? (Though it does seem like we have tried many...)

Also, I have no sensation during oral sex. It just feels "nice". I was wondering if there is any advice that could be given regarding this as well. In a previous relationship I have reached orgasm with oral stimulation, but it was rare and in all honesty I have no idea what he did to set me off; I just enjoyed the moment.

I also have other issue... I tend not feel anything while my boyfriend "plays" with me or while masturbating. I'll admit, I am not too fond of masturbating and rarely do it. I have made myself orgasm and I don't feel awkward, I just am not sure what to stimulate since it is something I do not often do.

I know that every one is different and I do know it is import to do self-exploration, but some direction or tips would be appreciated. I am getting a bit frustrated with this whole situation and sometimes find myself a bit resentful of my boyfriend since he can experience pleasure and I... well struggle.

It is an issue I would love to get resolved and I know I have to do my homework and find what I like.... but a bit of advice from others would be great.

Thank you in advance.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Sensuality.

Start looking at everything as sensual... Having a blank mind will not work... Tasting food and "visualising" does an Oyster look like you, does that Octopus equal the slickness of a wet, well thing..Being careful

Sensuality even touching a flower, smelling it, and thinking of sex, how it can equate may bring you to the level of sensuality of the self, you.

[jns]

When my boyfriend and I have sex I feel nothing. I can feel him there... maybe some pressure but absolutely no pleasure. I am well aware that some women just do not get anything out of "penetration", which in all honesty is disappointing, but is there anything that I can do to maybe help the situation?

Are there any positions that may help? (Though it does seem like we have tried many...)

Also, I have no sensation during oral sex. It just feels "nice". I was wondering if there is any advice that could be given regarding this as well. In a previous relationship I have reached orgasm with oral stimulation, but it was rare and in all honesty I have no idea what he did to set me off; I just enjoyed the moment.

I also have other issue... I tend not feel anything while my boyfriend "plays" with me or while masturbating. I'll admit, I am not too fond of masturbating and rarely do it. I have made myself orgasm and I don't feel awkward, I just am not sure what to stimulate since it is something I do not often do.

I know that every one is different and I do know it is import to do self-exploration, but some direction or tips would be appreciated. I am getting a bit frustrated with this whole situation and sometimes find myself a bit resentful of my boyfriend since he can experience pleasure and I... well struggle.

It is an issue I would love to get resolved and I know I have to do my homework and find what I like.... but a bit of advice from others would be great.

Thank you in advance.

To many, the sensations of orgasm are something they cannot get enough of. Describe what you felt during orgasm. How did your body respond? How do you know you had an orgasm? I'm not convinced you had an orgasm.

[Mouse37]

I'm not sure how well I will be able to describe it, but I'll try. I had never felt so wonderful before.... Hm. I am honestly not too sure how to explain it. It felt absolutely amazing. It wasn't just someone down there... I felt so much more. A sensation that left me speechless. It felt so good that at one point thought about asking him to stop. I could hardly handle how good it felt. After, I had to lay there and catch my breath. My heart had been beating fairly quick. I was hot and felt a little weak, shaky. Unlike previous times, there was a fantastic sensation. It seemed to travel through my legs and, as cliché as it might be, made my toes curl.

[Elanor-Jane]

Sounds like your not getting aroused at all. I had this problem when I was younger (although my mind still makes me take a while to get there, if I'm relaxed not so much). Keep masturbating and maybe read some erotica if you find porn too much. Vibrators with the bunny ears for your clit are great too. The more you masturbate the more u will get turned on and know what u like and transfer that to sex with a partner. Before I had my first orgasm I would have to stop as the sensation was too much to handle so I'd push my bf at the time away. Just got way to sensitive but wasn't an actual orgasm. Wasn't til I figured myself out a bit that it happened with partners. Your head on the other hand is a different kettle of fish. Try not to overthink it or you'll obsess too much and lose it altogether. Hopefully you'll be lucky and find a guy that's talented or just patient also. As long as your persistent you'll b ok, it's just hard to get started

[Mouse37]

Okay, thank you very much for all your input. I will have to look into reading some erotica... And actually, I wouldn't be apposed to porn... I'll have to start experimenting a bit.

[Elanor-Jane]

Even fanfiction that leans towards erotica can be great, I'm sure there's plenty of true blood fanfiction/erotica, this would be my favourite! Lol Alexander skarsgard has featured on many of my favourite reels! Lol

[Mouse37]

Haha that is so ironic. I love Alexander Skarsgard too. Had plenty to look at with the episode "Cold, Gray Light of Dawn" x) Hm. I was thinking about fan-fiction too. I'll have to see what I can find. Not sure where to look exactly, but it will be another challenge to get though.

[flourie]

i would say...before you even touch erotica or porn.....why dont you try being with yourself first, explore your body, no expectations....just see what you like doing to yourself, there is no correct way to touch yourself, what feels good is how you should do it and no other way, some women find the clit overly sensitive, so they touch other parts of their area...so put some soft music on and have some fun . i do know what you mean, i felt this way too and i was so frustrated that one day i decided i was only going get back to having sex once i've explored my body completely and let me tell you, i never understood how women felt horny without the thought of a man..... now i do ... but if you are in a loving relationship thats even better, in fact your partner can help you. you tell him what to do, what not to do, pressure levels. but dont stop masturbating. this way you will get in touch with your self and your relationship will also flourish once barriers come down . remember! never focus on the orgasm, if you focus on the orgasm, there is a high chance you may not have one because of the stress of wanting one.... just focus on what feels good, explore, experiment and when goodness reaches its peak... ul have the big O...there is no escaping it.

[Mouse37]

Thank you, Flourie. That is something I sometimes find myself struggling with too (The idea of becoming horny without a man). It is reassuring that someone else has had the same thoughts and have overcome them.