[TaraLynn]

Okay, so let me start from the beggining; I started having sex at 15years old, I enjoyed it very much. I had been with the same person from then til I was about 23. In that time everything went from feeling good to very little or no feeling at all. We split up due to other relationship issues. I have since re-married and my husband (we've been married for almost 3years now) had brought back the feeling and pleasure I had at one time experianced. But now, it is happening again and it is worse. I have never had an orgasim, by myself or with anyone else. I am seriously starting to wonder if something is wrong with me or maybe I am broken. Any advice would be much appreciated. Thank you.

[Mes T]

You've never had an orgasm, and say that sex went from being enjoyable to no feelings at all. It's no surprise! In my opinion, anyway!

How long can a human being enjoy sex when they're not actually getting any orgasms from it? Not very. Sure that enjoyment reignites with a new partner, because everything is new and fresh, and then it goes back to just being BLAH.

There are a lot more women in this exact same situation than you may think. The first step is to learn to masturbate. You CAN do it. When you have some time to yourself at home, make yourself comfortable, grab your favorite naughty book or movie or whatever, think of things that turn you on, that give you that tingling feeling... and touch yourself. Don't go into it with high expectations - let yourself relax, explore your body, see what feels good and what doesn't. Eventually you WILL get there. It's all about being in the right mood and taking it easy. Make sure your fingers are wet (much more sensation that way), and experiment with a small vibrator on your clit as well, if you can.

Once you have mastered the technique of pleasuring yourself, you can teach your partner to do the same. But if you don't take this very crucial time for yourself, then I'm afraid sex will likely never be very good for you.

[TaraLynn]

See, I have tryed masterbation and i get nowhere. Yeah, I get all excited and heaving breathing and all that stuff. But, nothing happens. My husband and I can be going at it and he finishes and I'm just sitting there wondering what just happened!?!?!?! I end up more frusterated/depressed/lonely than ever after sex. I want my big finish too. I've seen MANY videos of ladies that have explosive orgasims and very large clitoris'. I have noticed that my clitoris is extreemly tiny (almost pointless to even have it) and it doesn't seem to respond to touching or feeling of any kind. The doctors I have talked to lately are no help what-so-ever. I am so lost, I don't even know which way is up anymore.

[Mes T]

Do you literally get no sensation from touching your own clitoris? It sounds like *something* is happening if you get excited when you do. It's hard to reach that very first orgasm because you don't really know what feeling you're going for until it happens. But you CAN do it. If you've been to the doctors and they've said there's nothing physically wrong with you, then you must assume it's a mental thing. And mental things can be gotten over. I'm sure your husband coming every time you have sex isn't helping in a way... because as you say, it's like... okay... what about me?? Does he know you're having struggles with this?