[Guest]

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[Claret]

I have to ask why you assume it's all about you and your issues. There is a lot at play here, your upbringing, your lack of exerience and the probability that you've never fully let your self go. I understand the reluctance to initiate and your disappointment when your husband doesn't pick up on what you've been thinking about all day. Why does your mind wander when you're having sex? Have you very stressful days, children, parents or work that is interferring? You, sometimes, have to make sex a priority. When your mind starts to wander, pull it back -- make a conscious effort to focus on what is happening. Where are his hands, what does his back feel like, look into his eyes try to see what he is seeing, feeling and experiencing. Forget about what you are feeling and focus on him. I think once you start concentrating on him and doing what feels good to him, you'll forget about your hang ups for that time. This will have the effect of letting your body just naturally experience the good feelings without you wondering if and when they will happen and if they don't happen why not.

[Texasred]

Have you been tested for ADD - attention deficit disorder? It could well be that a little ritalin or some such drug would fix you right up. There may be other non-drug therapies as well; I'm no expert, but it sure does sound like you've got some kind of ADD. At any rate, your issues are psychological and not sexual, or not sexual alone.
You need some help, and you should get it as soon as possible.