Buttercup
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help
Hi ... I got married sometime back and I was having periods during the time i got married... i n my husband waited and made love till i was ok... v both were virgins n the first time i didnt enjoy it and he came in me due to which i had to take an ipill... for sometime we did make love but whenever he got inside me i didnt feel anything ! n never reached orgasm...and he could only hold up for a very limitied time period... plus i was naturally over lubricated i feel.. n there was no clit. stimulation..... somehow i havent enjoyed it... can u help n tell me where we lack and how to improve..! sometimes i thought his tool was too thin.. but on second thoughts i feel the issue is different... ! i did try to stimulate him when he used to go soft.. but he only does fingering and that doesnt work much... we have been away for a few months now and i dont know if i will get to the pt. of org. ever ! when v r together next.
Buttercup -
Buttercup, sex is something you learn slowly. Unlike the movies and romance novels, its not the wonderful experience where both people know exactly what to do the first time. Couple of things to remember. The first few times, the guy may not last long, but even so, 7 minutes is pretty average. Losing an erection is pretty common too. Can happen, especially if you are nervous.
About the orgasm, there are lot of threads on this site about how to have an orgasm. Try to search for them. Remember, it may take a while before you figure out how to have one. The most important thing to remember is that most women require clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm. Penetration, by a penis or finger won't do much. Try masturbating yourself while he is inside of you, or have him manually stimulate you. With many couples, the man will orally bring a woman to orgasm first and then they will try intercourse.
Communication is very important. You need to tell your partner what feels good and what doesn't. You need to explore together instead of just laying back and expecting him to give you an orgasm. Read some books. Talk to each other how what you can try. Enjoy every aspect of sex, not just intercourse. Enjoy being close to the person you love and enjoyment will come, even if you don't reach orgasm.Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose - Kris Kristofferson and Fred Foster (sung by Janis Joplin) -
thanks sp346, You are absolutely right ... n thank you so much .. I will try and work on that. I do agree that clit stimulation is imp. which never happened when we made love. I guess thats because it was too early for us to get started... Im sure with time and communication it should happen then.... thanks :-)Comment
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Hi, I'm new to the forums, and just saw your post. I have been reading a lot about clitorial stimulation, as I am not sure I ever even had an orgasm, not properly anyway, and I found some interesting things about position. You can of course try self stimulation, Or you move his hands to where you want them.
I have generally noticed that it is possible that the usual positions, whilst maybe nice or comfortable seem to totally miss your clit, for a guy if he comes, usually he will orgasm, but for us women it is different. You could try standing up, the angle is different and as he enters you his shaft should rub your clit too.
As sp346 says, communication is essential, even if you are telling your partner what you like, and vice versa, he needs to tell you what he wants.
If you are not sure what you want then perhaps spend some time with your self, it's easier to tell him what you want when you know yourself.
Sex isn't everything in a relation ship, there are other ways to be close, try holding each other, kissing, etc, and not just going straight for sex. Men have sensitive points too, maybe you can explore these also, and enjoy each other.
Good luck buttercup.Never judge on face value, never assume someone is ok, because to you they look it. Enjoy life and what you have, don't take it for granted, not everyone is as lucky as you.Comment
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