[jelliedfox]

Okay, I have been having sex for almost a year with my boyfriend, and soon enough, husband. He and I are planning on having a baby soon, and one of the things that bothers me, sometimes, is how I rarely ever feel anything from sex. It'll be a bit disappointing, for him, and for me, to know I havent fully enjoyed sex, to just have to stop for 9 months soon after, and have everything be a bit different after the baby is born. So I am trying, and been trying, to enjoy it as much as possible.

Recently, about 2 months or so ago, I finally had a real orgasm. For once, I never felt so amazing. My body quivered, everything was perfect. From that day o, I could do it various times in one day just from him using his tongue on my clitoris. The only frustrating thing is, whether i orgasm before or after he puts his penis in, I feel NOTHING. All I feel is his penis in and out, and its so annoying! I don't care about hollywood's vision of sex, I know its not that good, but seriously, if you have people raping each other, and other crazy things to make porn and such, why do I NOT feel anything? Ive asked my friends and family, and they all say im weird, that sex is GREAT FOR THEM. It's like, how do women have sex with so many guys, emotionally attached or not, and feel so amazing to do it again, and i want to stop half way through? It's not fair.

I know its not my boyfriend. I love him very much, an he is very understanding, but even he gets upset sometimes, because he thinks he cant pleasure me. I know that's not the case. if when he licks me I feel what other people are saying, but when were, 'doing it', its differently, its makes me think its my vagina or something. He is about 6 inches, and hes very thick, so I feel every part of him, but its just doesn't feel good. It feels like hes rubbing me. I've used toys, porn, vibrators, different positions, everything! Doggy style I feel only a little fraction of what is presumed to be pleasure. The only thing I that feels good is him licking me..... and it sucks, because I want to make love to him, and enjoy all of him.

Now, when i say read thoroughly, I mean it for the fact that all the answers I see, always say the same thing. Oh, try a toy, try different positions, you need to be emotionally attached, clear your mind, stop thinking this, or stop thinking that.. but the thing is, I've tried all that. What I am really wondering, is if there is a medical problem, here? My boyfriend says he feels my vagina get really tight, and then orgasm from him inside me, but i dont even feel that. I just feel the lube and wetness. Someone please help, because no mater what, nothing happens. I try, nothing, when i just lay back and let him do is thing, and just enjoy it, nothing. It's just a stupid, soft, rubbing sensation that gets me no where but frustrated when my boyfriend is done, because it was like nothing happened.

And no, i dont go into sec thinking negatively, and yes, i am FULLY turned on from the porn I watch, and from him licking, its just RIGHT WHEN HE STARTS THRUSTING, that everything goes away, and it makes me really, really, really sad. ):

[jns]

Sex does not have to end or even slow down a lot during pregnancy. Having sex will not harm the baby and neither will getting oral during those months. Consult with a doctor about when you should curtail activities, but it should be almost until having the baby. You will have a longer time after the baby is born while your body heals from the childbirth.

As for intense pleasure from intercourse: not every woman gets a lot of sensations. With him being so thick; I hope you two are using a good lube, probably a store bought one. You did mention lube, but I wasn't sure if it's doing the job. Maybe you can get more pleasure after he brings you to orgasm several times before intercourse.

[jelliedfox]

As for intense pleasure from intercourse: not every woman gets a lot of sensations. With him being so thick; I hope you two are using a good lube, probably a store bought one. You did mention lube, but I wasn't sure if it's doing the job. Maybe you can get more pleasure after he brings you to orgasm several times before intercourse.

I am not going to respond to the sex while being pregnant thing because that doesnt really pertain to my question. I am uncomfortable having sex while pregnant, not for the baby matters, its just weird to me. So, thats just a no for personal discomfort. I cant get turned on if I am not aroused or like it, lol.

As for lube, I had an orgasm three times before intercourse. My body is one of those that is blessed with plenty of natural lube. I get very wet, that sometimes its sloshy, (too much info?) I even tried without orgasming, just getting extremely wet, or using the lotion lube, or orgasming, then sex, etc, nothing worked. If we ever needed lube, its because we were going so long that I eventually dried out. None of the factors above, unfortunately, is a problem. If I wasn't wet enough, it would hurt during penetration, and even during intercourse, but I do NOT feel any pain unless we are going at it for a long time because I get turned off because I again, I dont feel anything.

I understand completely that I might not get much sensations during sex, and thats fine, but I would think if it feels so good to so many people, that I would at least feel SOMETHING, rather than not anything at all. It's kind of ironic, hes thick, and all, but I still dont feel much of anything? What could be wrong with me? Extremely turned on to the point I want it so bad my body is pulsing, but then I get it and its like... this is it? Boooooo.

[jns]

I'm sorry I can't come up with a way to have you start feeling something during intercourse. Hopefully some others will join in and have something else to add. Weekends tend to be slow many times. Things should pick up on Monday. I've been getting connection problem messages since yesterday and problems like that may stop some people from posting for a day or two.

[T&M_2]

This seems to be a real problem for you, have you been to a doctor and ask for a professional opinion? Did you ever have a really bad sexual experience when you were younger? It sound like you have some issues with the penertration part of sex. Everthing before penertration turns you on and you even orgasm from him licking you. My opinion is that if you want to enjoy sex in the fullest, you should get a medical opinion. From what you say you have tried everything else and it only works to a certain point.

[jelliedfox]

Thanks to both of you, but yes, I asked my gyno. His answer was to find a man with a larger penis. I um, dont think that was the appropriate response, though. I will try again.

As for anything happening to me when I was younger or something, no, not really. One situation sucked but with my father, but I wasnt upset for that, but because of him. And the only thing I can really think of that might be anything, was when I lost my virginity to him. I was too inexperienced, and he was too nervous because he didnt want to ruin my first time, that he accidentally did, lol. We had to stop before it went in, and then the next day, we did it for like, five minutes, but I didnt like being on top so we stopped. Then, I didnt feel much either, and since then, its been a battle between me and my body.

If anyone does have any other suggestions, I dont mind listening. This topic will always remain open until I figure it out.. I mean, almost a full year of sex and the only thing I like is the stimulation, nothing else..

[jns]

I think it might be better to find a female gynecologist as she may have direct understanding of the problems women bring her, all this depending on if such a gynecologist was available. My family practice doctor is female, but for a urologist, I would maybe be partial to a male doctor since he would have some personal insight.

[drp]

Read some literature on finding your "g" spot. Either find it on your own using a toy or have your boyfriend help you find it with his fingers, which is easier because he should be able to feel it. Once found you should be able to orgasm by stimulating it. You also need to remember that it is much easier to have a clitoral orgasm than a vaginal one or at leat it is for me, always has been, and they feel totally different. It may take your body longer to "react' to a vaginal orgasm also and i mean in age. I was in my thirties before i really starting having consistent vaginal orgasms. Every persons body is different so dont expect to feel what everyone else does.Yes its frustrating feeling like you cant perform like the "others" but just contine to be pleasured with the clitoral orgasms and enjoy sex , it will come. Also just try some fun sex lotions and gels. There are also some that help tighten the vagina so there will be more internal friction. So again , just enjoy sex with the one you love, your orgasms area as unique as you are.

[jelliedfox]

Thanks to everyone that has answered thus far.

I will seek a female gynecologist, I do feel a bit savvy about a male telling me how good to feel, especially with the joke.
As for vaginal orgasms, from what my boyfriend says, I do have those, too. He said he feels my vagina get tighter and tighter, and release thick, creamy liquid he says is me coming. I am not sure how true this is, it my just be more lube from my body, but I am unsure. the only reason why I have my doubts, is because I dont feel like im excited enough to do that.

Me and him will go to the, "toy" store, as well. Maybe for vaginal tightening, (hes says that im tight, though I think its because hes thick, I dont know, lol), as well something else. I will say this. I dont like vibrating rings or anything.. is that okay? Do vibrators really work? I tried one, and well, it just felt my vagina was humming, or trying to copy a hummingbird heart beat. lmao

[DreamP346]

Sex is not just intercourse. Saying you don't enjoy intercourse but you enjoy oral is like saying I love steak, but I don't like ice-cream. True, most people love ice-cream, but its not "abnormal" to not like ice-cream.

The clitoris has tons of nerve endings versus the vagina has very few. That is why you enjoy the oral sex but not the intercourse. This makes total sense considering the women's anatomy. Don't think you are not normal at all. In many relationships, a partner will get the woman off first via oral and then have intercourse so the man can then have his orgasms. Some women love intercourse, some enjoy the pleasure it gives their partner (not necessarily feeling pleasure in itself) and other just tolerate it. Its completely normal.

Both you and your partner need to come to terms with that. Make sure you each are getting sexual satisfaction in whatever ways necessary. Don't get upset that intercourse isn't so pleasurable for you. Understand that we do things that personally we don't find pleasurable, but we do it to please our partner. So having intercourse to please your partner is totally fine. Your parnter shouldn't feel upset that its not that pleasurable.

something you can try to do is enjoy other things while having intercourse. What do you like? Maybe having your clit rubs, you neck nibbled on, deep kissing, etc. Do those thoses while having intercourse. Its not that the intercourse will suddenly feel better, but that moment will be filled with pleasure.

About the doctor who told you to find a larger penis! Find a new doctor because he/she is a quack. Anybody with a basic understanding of the female physiology would never say something like that.