[momofsailor]

I just wondered if there was anyone else out there who is left behind by the modern idea that women should be orgasmic and fully satisfied in sex? I'm not real young anymore, and in my life's experience I've only had an orgasmic event with someone else, just twice. Basically the only time I can achieve it is when I'm by myself, doing it for myself. I'd much rather just have sex without bothering with a climax, than to go through the frustration and embarrassment and the time it takes to try to have one with a partner. It's no fun at all trying to "get there", being watched, having someone get tired or feel like they aren't skilled, etc. and my body won't cooperate. I don't know why it has to be so difficult for women. I asked a friend who is older than me in her early 50's and of course, she said no probs, she has one every time. I have long been tempted to believe there are simply two different kinds of women, those who can have orgasms in sex and those who can't. I've always enjoyed a normal sex drive and ability in all the other areas but I find orgasm difficult and embarrassing. Anyone relate? Any suggestions? I'm sure I'm not an oddball but I feel like one anyway. I've given up on that part of sex and never ask my man to bother with it, and don't make it a part of our encounters.

[Element]

My man is my first and only and we've had an active sex life for a year now. It took me a long while to be comfortable, let go, and shut down my mind when I'm with my man so that I can. I've also found what positions my body needs to be able to climax so I can have the right stimulation. Heck, I'm still finding out what works for me, what feels good but doesn't get me "there".

Every single woman is different, our vagina's are different. So it's finding what works for you. What he's done with previous partners to make them orgasm won't be exactly what needs to do to you. To be blunt and simple about it; women do not have the same lock combination for orgasms. We all have our own combination.

Some women need penetration to stimulate them. Some need only clitoral. Some need both. Sometimes it just depends on your mood and how turned on you are before engaging in sexual activities. It depends on if it's sex, love making, quickie, animalistic.

I personally don't believe that sex is suppose to be robotic; same thing every **** night. I think it's suppose to be mixed up a little, don't let your body know exactly what's going to happen each step of the way. Go with your feelings and what your body is saying I need right now. And then going with what it needs the next minute. Variety helps.

[LaraTheOnigiri]

Basically the only time I can achieve it is when I'm by myself, doing it for myself. I'd much rather just have sex without bothering with a climax, than to go through the frustration and embarrassment and the time it takes to try to have one with a partner. It's no fun at all trying to "get there", being watched, having someone get tired or feel like they aren't skilled, etc.

You have just described my life!
I only orgasm through clitoral stimulation, but it can get wild and a little embarrassing, not to mention takes lots of time and effort (similar to you) so I don't usually bother anymore. Instead I opt for the criminal faking, and pay the price with unbearable frustration.

[Obelisk]

Ladies, I think every man now knows that you need your clit stimulated to orgasm.

Only idiot cavemen think just thrusting should be enough. I personally will do whatever my woman wants to make her feel good, and have zero issues knowing my penis alone is not likely to do the job. I understand it has nothing to do with me, but with basic anatomy.

Don't be afraid to tell your man how you like it. If he's a good guy he'll be happy to help.

[CHANDLERS WISH]

Obelisk,

I'm glad you will work with your partner to find her needs and visa versa, that's totally important. Too many people don't communicate and reading half of this, I can clearly see that's the case as fake orgasms take place

However, you aren't totally correct there. Read Elements post as a woman I have to agree with her. We are all different.

I definitely orgasm through penetration. And, can orgasm through a lot of things, but penetration can do it for me, if done right without any issues at all and he's not a caveman Though pulling hair is something I've always quite liked.....

[Debs21]

Me and my man have a fantastic time doing things I never thought possible, The first thing is to fully relax have little teases around the house. When you go to bed take it slow touch,kiss all over,then when you find the right position my fellow slides just the tip in very slow and breathes in my ear, after a few teases he will slowly slide all the way in hold it there for a few seconds then back out again,after doing this he will move off,go between my thighs and with the faintest of touches dart his tongue around my clit until I feel close, he stops to build it up then climbs back on top, again just slipping in slowly til I'm practically dying to explode, after a couple of slow thrusts he then pushes hard ensuring each time he pulls back his member brushes against my clit, then he speeds up breathing in my ear and that always gives me the big o

Patience and talking to each other is one of the best ways and don't be afraid to act out a fantasy by speaking to each other what turns you on.